Conversations with Madeline McQuillan

Today we’d like to introduce you to Madeline McQuillan.

Madeline, we appreciate you taking the time to share your story with us today. Where does your story begin?
Insanity is a fine line that is said to be intricately intertwined with genius. As a young, whitty, and curious child, I managed to find the line, picked it up, and start jumping rope with it.

I have always been a person doing SOMETHING. Growing up, I was enrolled in whirlwind of numerous activities, soccer, tennis, Soap Box Derby, Mock Trial, drama, the speech team, the art club, you name it and I was a part of it. Because of a life packed with numerous interests, I like to think of myself as powerhouse creative and all-around thespian. My days are generally a crammed pack cycle of chaos, and I would have it no other way.

As an actress, writer, filmmaker, photographer, makeup artist, stylist, and small business owner, I have never been satisfied doing just one thing.

I made my stage debut at the age of five with the traveling theatre troupe that came annually to the small Western Nebraska town I was raised in. There was no going back after my first on stage performance, a seagull in Treasure Island. While I did not figure it out until college, I act because empathy is my religion. It’s how I make sense of the world and find meaningful connections. As my perception and understanding of the world continue to evolve and progress, so has my interest in the other side of the camera.

At 13 years old, I found myself working as a photography assistant, a job that never felt like work at all because I enjoyed it so much. Learning about composition and cameras catapulted me into the direction of my deepest passion, the film industry.

Ideally, I never want to be doing just one thing on a set. I want to be the first person there to drink bad coffee with a table full of stressed out writers working on rewrites. I want to do bloody gore makeup and help sew buttons onto a costume, to spend hours staring at a screen, editing. I want to be a part of the entirety of it, to breathe life into a film, and create meaningful works of art. From location scouting to craft services, my heart beats for movie magic. Even if I am lucky enough to be casted in something, in between takes and running lines, you will always find me talking to the gaffer, production designer, grip or art director, anyone that will entertain my curiosity.

I transplanted from Chicago in 2018 after graduating from Columbia College Chicago with two bachelor’s degrees: Bachelor of Arts in Acting for the Stage and Screen and Bachelor of Arts in Multimedia Journalism, with an emphasis in writing. It was always my goal to end up in Los Angeles, and it feels so right to be here. It feels even more right when the world is operating and life is happening. I am eager to move past Covid and continue writing my story, the sly twists and turns, those juicy ups and downs, stay tuned……

Alright, so let’s dig a little deeper into the story – has it been an easy path overall and if not, what were the challenges you’ve had to overcome?
Challenges, how lame and boring (though less stressful) would our world be without the occasional wrench thrown in your plans? I could open my own plumbing business with all the wrenches and ratchets I’ve acquired over my 25 years of living.

I am and always will be my biggest challenge. I am often at war with myself and can be deeply, deeply critical of everything I do. This started at an early age, as I have struggled with anxiety and depression since I was ten years old. Sprinkle in eating disorders and a bit of body dysmorphia and you basically have my demons in a nutshell.

It’s no secret that Los Angeles is crazy pricy. I struggle with the balance of working dead-end jobs to pay bills and aggressively pursuing my passions. I am a very hard worker, I give all of my energy to whatever it is I am doing, often spreading myself too thin; especially if given an artistic opportunity. When this happens, I feel like my art, a bit of my soul, gets watered down. This is when I feel most like a failure. When I doubt my capabilities and question my training, I often equating it with my worth, a slippery slope. Not getting down on myself is a constant battle and full-time job.

Thanks – so what else should our readers know about your work and what you’re currently focused on?
I am always pursuing creative outlets to capitalize on. I shoots headshots and promotional footage for small businesses. I copyright for various websites and have been commissioned for costume creation and product photography. I am truly your residential artistic jack of all trades.

There are a few fail-safe activities that cheer me up when I’m down, thumbing through thrift stores and scourning estate sales. I happened to inherit my mother’s self-coping mechanism of therapeutic shopping. During quarantine in 2020, to produce a crumb of serotonin, I visited as many shops that I could find open. Within weeks I had acquired 50+ vintage pieces. I started to get anxious as my closets filled. “What am I going to do with this, I can’t even fit into some of it,” I thought to myself.

So I took my love of vintage clothing, the loot I had acquired, and my experience with alterations and put it to use. I established QUIRK UNLIMITED, an online boutique that specializes in vintage, flipped thrift, and oddities. There are so many stories in a single piece of clothing, a living, wearable piece of history. In college, I took several fashion journalism classes where I learned to researching era-specific pieces and about the designers who produced them.

My favorite piece I have found is a black wool, 3/4 sleeve dress coat. It was manufactured during the second world war when fabric was being rationed. It has a mink collar and is in one of my most prized possessions. I look at a piece like this and wonder, who wore it? What did they do? What battles were they facing? Where did they wear the coat? Were they a happy person? Infinite questions. I may never know who owned it, but I feel like I have helped their memory live on by caring for their clothing.

On weekends, you can find me posted up at different flea markets in and around Los Angeles. The energy is almost always amazing. The relationship and friendship between vendors and spenders is inspiring to me. I love meeting like-hearted folk and swapping stories. Recently, I have started hosting shows on Popshoplive, a live shopping experience where I get to be a goof, show off my vintage goods, and have a consistent audience.

While I am always self-taping auditions and submitting my headshots, I am not yet the business entity as an actor I strive to be. Presently, I have a small acting gig at the Madcap Motel, an immersive, 1960s themed wormhole experience. I love the spirit of collaboration and am always seeking new projects to be a part of, as I mentioned, in literally any way I can.

If I am not working any of those hustles, you can find me painting with heavy brush strokes, cooking pasta, developing a new cocktail, or binging The Nanny.

The crisis has affected us all in different ways. How has it affected you and any important lessons or epiphanies you can share with us?
It’s very odd to reflect on the last 18 months. So so much has happened, and I have had a rough time processing it all. My entirety of 2020 was lived alone in a one bedroom apartment in Highland Park. I was forced to really sit with myself through some tough spots. I had no choice but to confront trauma in an attempt to heal some deep wounds. I was rewarded with loads of tears and some pretty epiphanic moments.

I learned that many, many people do not care for or about their fellow man. I learned that a deadly disease could be politicized into an all-consuming weapon of genuine and real mass destruction. That doing the right thing, though it may seem so simple to some, is viewed as a direct assault and infringement on one’s rights to others. I was reminded how deeply divided our country is on nearly every human rights issue and how far people will go to spread hate. We saw the continued brutal beatings and murders of Black Americans at the hands of a gruesome institution; An institution with a horrifying history and deplorable present. I was woken up to a lot of horrific truths that I was privileged enough to be ignorant to for my entire life.

But I also learned, people can be strong–in fact, I can be strong. I AM strong. I learned that the resilience of the human spirit is not just a character arch in a movie plot, it is our everyday lives. Those who did band together through this storm ignited a deep passion for the pursuit of truth and the power of knowledge. I am now hungry to learn more and question all that is. I have learned to think critically and deeper than ever. I learned to be more and more thankful of even the tiniest delights. I cherish my family so much and am beyond lucky to have their love and support, even while thousands of miles apart. I learned about true sacrifice and pain from our brave doctors, nurses, and hospital staff. While everything felt uncertain and unsafe, they persisted to help their communities and keep America alive.

Through the truly terrible, I was still reminded that there are good people in the world. That love holds more space than hate and that if you choose to love those around you and give where you can, good will thrive. The clouds are finally starting to part, though I cautiously am emerging with a light scene trepidation, I at least feel the forward momentum. I am grateful to be alive and to have felt the painful lessons, for they remind me of all that is joy.

Contact Info:

• Email: [email protected]
• Website: https://www.madelinemcquillan.com/
• Instagram: @haus_mcquillan

Image Credits:
All photography provided is done by Madeline McQuillan