Rising Stars: Meet 20 year-old Merlot Ghadoushi

Today we’d like to introduce you to Merlot Ghadoushi.

Hi Merlot, thanks for sharing your story with us. To start, maybe you can tell our readers some of your backstory. 

Hi Everyone! My name is Merlot Ghadoushi, and I am a UC Berkeley student. I love going to Malibu, Abbot Kinney, singing, journalism, and abstract art. 

My story starts when I was just in a stroller. Each spring, I would participate in the walk to END Epilepsy with my family, from 6 months old and I will never stop. When I was 13 years old, I felt like something needed to change. After seeing someone very close to me have a seizure, I felt like I had to do more. So, I got an internship at the Epilepsy Foundation of Los Angeles and enrolled in a class called Passion Project in conjunction with Google’s program. While in this class, I created a non-profit called “Passion to END Epilepsy,” where I worked with Chipotle, Panda Express, and California Pizza Kitchen and raised over 15,000 dollars in the span of a couple of months. All of these funds were donated to the Epilepsy Foundation for Dr. Antonio Escuata’s research. Following that, I was inspired to create change through awareness, so I created the teen program at the LA affiliate, which had monthly teen support groups, art projects, and celebrities who had epilepsy share their stories. 

Additionally, many teens from the support group mentioned, “I just want to feel normal.” So, I thought, what does “normal” even mean? I created Un-normal Normal, where warriors with epilepsy did not allow it to hold them back rather empower them to be confident and have a space to talk about their ambitions and desires while also testing out new waters and experiences. At the end of the day, being unique creates diversity which creates beauty in this world. It is imperative to celebrate that and have safe spaces to talk freely without judgement from ourselves and others. 

Following my involvement at my local affiliate, I was asked to become a national ambassador at the Epilepsy Foundation of America, speak at events, and was also given an internship. Following my summer internship for two consecutive years, I decided I wanted to do something more. I wanted to make a big change in the community, so I am currently working on getting first responders in my community seizure first-aid certified and members of large corporations which have been extremely successful. I want to create change for my community, not just for today or next month, but something that would have an impact for a lifetime.

In addition to my work as a national ambassador for the Epilepsy Foundation of America, I am a huge advocate for mental health. Each Monday, I speak at the UCLA Neuropsychiatric Hospital with both patients and hospital staff. I think that our voices matter more than ever and these stories need to be heard and felt in a communal in-person space. I remember connecting with a patient a couple of weeks ago who had a very similar story as me. This patient said, “thank you for sharing your story because this is the first time I am saying this and I feel seen and heard, it truly makes a difference” and then gave me a hug. It is in these moments that remind me that humanity and connection are still there and it is something I would like to see more of both in society and in the mental health field. Meeting this patient heavily impacted both of our lives and it goes to show that one small moment can change everything. 

In addition to going to the psychiatric hospital and speaking, I am also the youngest member of the UCLA Psychiatric Patient and Family Advisory Council. While being part of this council, I have created a cultural inclusion impact, creating a space where all cultures can be heard and seen as well as talking to staff about how we can grow. I very much value my work and relationship with UCLA, it is an incredible community. 

Furthermore, I am part of NAMI National as a National Next Gen Advisor where I speak at conferences, travel to Washington D.C., speak with senators, and also co-host webinars, write articles, and attend many meetings which can be life changing to many groups of people. Recently, I just spoke on a panel to large companies talking about how including the youth voice is crucial to success and the importance of including pacing breaks throughout both the work day and year for our mental health. 

Something really meaningful that happened this past year was receiving the Presidential Lifetime Achievement Award at 20 years old. It felt surreal to be recognized for years of volunteering and advocacy. More than anything, I am grateful for the people I have met along the way and for every opportunity I’ve had to make someone feel seen, supported, or a little less alone.

Lastly, I have also worked heavily on advocacy for both Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder (PMDD) and Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) and how they intersect. After learning that one of my closest friends struggles with these and I saw her go through an immense amount of pain, I constantly reminded her that these are just words that they have to use clinically yet, they do not define her. I also suggested that she can start living a holistic life beyond these labels, being authentically herself without being suffocated and locked in a room with these labels. 

The intersection between these two diagnoses is constantly overlooked and there is very little research about it, yet it impacts so many women intensely. That is why I have written many research papers about this subject while in college and I am working with NAMI West LA to co-host the first annual PMDD conference on October 2nd. There will be psychiatrists, therapists, pelvic floor therapists, and real stories shared. To add on, I also created a children’s book on Dialectical Behavioral Therapy and Borderline Personality Disorder called The Flower Bundle: We Need All the Flowers, Not Just One. I wanted kids to feel like they could access skills early on, but also help older generations to heal their inner child. 

At this point in my journey today, I have learned skills to help my anxiety like journaling, watching the sunset, spending time with friends, and jumping into cold bodies of water to help my nervous system come back to equilibrium. I am proud of how far I have come and how far I will go. I have realized that healing is not just about managing the symptoms of my anxiety or getting through life’s obstacles. It is also about feeling like you are authentically living your life, not just merely surviving it. It is very important that we find enjoyment and the beauty in life. It reminds me of Donald Winnicott’s writing where he once wrote, “Feeling real is more than existing; it is finding a way to exist as oneself… and to have a self into which to retreat for relaxation.” I think that is something I have slowly learned throughout my life and now carry with me into this new chapter at UC Berkeley.

Would you say it’s been a smooth road, and if not what are some of the biggest challenges you’ve faced along the way? 

When I was in first grade, I remember having vocab tests and timed multiplication quizzes. I remember staying up late at night practicing with my mom to make sure I knew everything “perfectly.” She would remind me to, “Take a deep breath and be as cool as a cucumber,” because I would turn red and feel tension in my body. That is when I first learned I had anxiety. From multiplication tables, to color coordinated schedules, to timed water breaks, and annotating my book so much that I was no longer allowed to add any more notes, I struggled with perfectionism and anxiety. As I grew older, I had a stage where I hated my anxiety so much and I just wanted to get rid of it. Every single time someone would tell me to just breathe or not be anxious I would feel even more overwhelmed. So, I just learned to say “it’s fine” or add 700 things to my plate because it was easier to just hide behind the mask of anxiety. So, I got four jobs, took 24 units a semester while maintaining a 4.0, wrote transfer applications, managed two non-profit initiatives, all while being a daughter and sister. It was too much. Yet, I struggled to say “no’ to anything. So, I continued to take on anything and everything. 

Eventually, after many people told me that sleeping three hours a night was not sustainable and eventually burned out, I listened. So, I started prioritizing sleep and learning that I do not have to say yes to everything. Rather, I can pace myself. 

As you know, we’re big fans of you and your work. For our readers who might not be as familiar, what can you tell them about what you do? 

I am an incoming Psychology and Interdisciplinary Studies Field (ISF) double major with a minor in Journalism and on a Pre-med track. I know that sounds like a lot (and trust me it is haha). But, all of these things intersect with each other and allow me to create change through both psychology and writing, one of my true passions. 

I am also the CEO of Unmasked Authenticity, a non-profit, technology-free initiative where I gather with people in person to disconnect from our phones and put them in a locked box. From there, we focus on taking off the masks we may wear every day, whether socially, professionally,

or even with ourselves. We engage in authentic conversation, do abstract art, and take off the social pressure to be real and find comfort in the uncomfortable. My goal is to make 

Is there anyone you’d like to thank or give credit to? 

I have had many people in my life support me throughout my journey. 

I would like to thank two influential women in my life who have always been there for me night and day. No matter what it is, they have always been there for me night and day. 

Furthermore, my current therapist has had a big impact on my life, helping me look beneath the surface and understand myself in a way that has genuinely changed how I move throughout the world. They also taught me the importance of being proud of myself, not only for what I accomplish, but for the growth that no one else gets to see. 

I would also like to thank all of the hardworking healthcare workers who have shown up for patients and their families during some of the most difficult and most vulnerable times of someone’s life. Their work often goes unrecognized; however, it is their compassion and patience that can leave an impact someone carries long after they leave. 

Contact Info: 

• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/merlot-ghadoushi
• Other: https://www.nami.org/who-we-are/meet-nami-next-gen/merlot-ghadoushi/