Conversations with Tori Rogers

Today we’d like to introduce you to Tori Rogers.

Hi Tori, we’d love for you to start by introducing yourself.
Planning and hosting parties has always been my passion. Attention to detail, aesthetics, fun experiences, troubleshooting, and entertaining were innate qualities growing up, so I was the obvious “go to” person to help people plan their parties and celebrations.

In 1998 I got engaged and we knew we wanted to plan our wedding in Hawaii. It has been my favorite place since I was 11 years old, and it instantly felt like home. The internet (www) was still rather new then, so I personally interviewed venues and vendors for a week to find the right fit for our vision. Every venue offered me a position as their events manager because I asked unique questions. To this day, when I visit a venue, I am told I ask great questions that have not previously been asked during a site visit.
At the time, I had a career as a Special Education Teacher and a thriving private practice as an Educational Therapist in California, and had no intention of changing careers. I ended up planning my own wedding because I was not thrilled with my options of planners, and I did not like their inflexible and impersonal approach to wedding planning. They wanted to limit my vendor selection (some wouldn’t even tell me the names of the vendors they planned to hire) and charge me 20% of the total cost of my wedding. I would have no control over our wedding planning. As a Type A person who is not the most trusting and likes to have at least SOME control of what affects me, I was very uncomfortable with that arrangements. I planned my own wedding in Hawaii, which was a huge success, and handled all of the hiccups that typically take place on the wedding day.
My vendors and my parents encouraged me to plan for others, suggesting I do it as a second business alongside my private practice. Why not? I knew the islands well, I had done the research, and the Internet allowed the world to access my services.

Hawaiian Island wedding Planners was established in 1998. I eventually changed the name to Hawaii Weddings by Tori Rogers, and then landed on Celebrations by Tori so my name did not limit the scope of my events.

Originally, I honed in on weddings in Hawaii publicly and weddings in California privately. The vibe was just different between vendors in the two states. In Hawaii, we work with the same people often because the islands have fewer options. We like each other, we socialize with each other, and we support each other. The wedding industry in Hawaii is like extended family, or ohana. That closeness and overall support was not quite the same at the time in California, so I only planned events for people I knew. I am passionate about planning, and truly enjoy what I do, so I want to be around like-minded professionals. My approach is still unique from others, from my personalized response to inquiries, to my pricing and approach to planning. Every event is unique and planned with intention and care. Each vendor is carefully curated, and every detail is thoughtfully planned and designed to personalize every wedding’s aesthetic and experience. We customize every celebration to align with the guest(s) of honor and their guests. Whether it is a wedding, mitzvah, corporate event, birthday party, graduation,

Here I am, 28 years in business, 30+ years in the industry, and I still love what I do. The difference is I now am publicly planning and coordinating in California, as well as Hawaii. The industry has softened a bit in So Cal and I have established many amazing professional relationships with like-minded quality vendors.

So, who is my client?
My client is professional, kind, appreciative of the above and beyond service I provide, and has a realistic budget for their vision. They want a beautiful aesthetic, but not over the top because they care more about the overall experience than going over the top to show off or prove something. If it’s a wedding, they love each other and communicate with each other. They don’t trust everything on Tik Tok, and they quickly learn to trust me. My clients are respectful to each other and to their professionals. While they may be spending 6 figures on a wedding, they understand that we are only earning a small percentage of that. I do not tolerate rude behavior or entitlement, and kindness melts my heart.

What makes my style and approach unique from the others?
It blows my mind that venues and vendors are still blown away when I present a detailed timeline, floor plan, information about the client so they know them better, and ensure they are fed if working the reception or over 4 hours. My attention to detail and communication is apparently still a unique characteristic.
My pricing structure has remained the same since Day one, and that is I do not charge percentages, I do not count emails or phone calls, and I do not increase vendor pricing. The amount of misrepresentation out there astonishes me, and it is the reason why so many couples do not trust planners. We can all inform potential clients of our value, but they don’t truly understand what that means until they are already mid-planning. It is absurd to me that planners charge a fee AND increase vendor prices. My goal is to earn my fee and provide discounts for my clients so they access as many experiences as possible, This allows more industry professionals to work, and more fun for the guests. Why sacrifice quality and fun for greed? My clients see the invoices and pay the professionals directly. Complete transparency and honesty, which are apparently still rare.
With all of that transparency comes direct responses. I will not promise what I cannot deliver, and I will always share the pros and cons while also strategizing a way to make your vision work. Every event is a collaboration, and each event’s success is due to a team approach. Whether I am your full service planner or your month of/day of coordinator, my dedication to creating an unforgettable experience for you and your guests is the same. Recently I had a bride who NEVER dreamed of getting married, never thought of getting married, never wanted a wedding, and wondered why people have weddings during our entire planning journey. On her wedding day she approached me and said, “I never want this day to end.” That is how I want everyone to feel.

The special relationships that I have nurtured for decades, my strong work ethic, my passion and my skills have allowed my business to thrive through many personal and professional hardships, including cancer, widowhood, 9/11, 2008 recession, fires and floods, and Covid. Not everyone can say their businesses survived those things, so I’m incredibly proud of my accomplishments and our industry.

We all face challenges, but looking back would you describe it as a relatively smooth road?
Event planning is anything but smooth. Business ownership is especially challenging.
1) My first company name was Hawaiian Island Wedding Planners because I was one of the very few who planned events on all inhabited Hawaiian Islands. There was a company named Hawaiian Island Weddings whose owner harassed me for years about the name. When the trend grew for business owners to include their own names in their business names, I renamed my company Hawaii Weddings by Tori Rogers.
2) A series of national and natural disasters, health and personal issues, and the economy definitely compromised the wedding and event industry. Many businesses closed, but I found ways to sacrifice, pivot, and persevere.
3) When I first started my business, I was not as discretionary with client selection or event type. My clientele included celebrities, local Hawaiian residents, small beach wedding couples, international and domestic US clients, clients of all ages and income brackets, multicultural clients, and celebrations of all sizes. I offered packages that everyone wanted to customize, so I discontinued packages. I just wanted to accommodate everyone, including the rude, demanding, unappreciative, disrespectful, entitled clients. I think people watched Bridezilla and felt they could be that person; or they watched David Tutera and felt they could get something for nothing. It took me a while to feel comfortable saying “no” to people and decline inquiries.
4) Social Media is a gift and a curse. Couples think everything they need to know to plan their wedding is on tik tok or Instagram. First, we are not sharing all essential industry secrets on social media so you can do our jobs. Trust me that there are a million things you don’t know that you need to consider for your wedding day. Second, most clients love what they see on social media and cannot afford it, are unaware that it is AI generated, or completely outside their budget. Third, some sources of “theories” and “suggestions” on social media are not actually industry experts, and end up misleading and misinforming people.
5) Clients who rely on friends and relatives to provide services for their special occasions can be a blessing and a curse. While I appreciate the personalization of it all, the lack of professionalism can be very problematic. Friends and relatives who are guests tend to less reliable and punctual as professionals. Professionals do not drink alcohol or use substances while working an event, while friends and relatives may not adhere to these rules. I encourage friends and relatives to participate when possible, but I communicate policies and procedures with them in advance to avoid chaos on the event day.
6) Event planning is a fluid industry. With longevity comes a lot of change, including client needs, marketing, accessibility, technology, business practices, resources, protocol, networking, people’s work ethic, expectations of others, and the economy. Wedding and Event Planners wish they could just do that part of their businesses, but we are expected to do it all for a clientele who does not see the value in our fees commensurate with our work load.
7) It takes a while for a planner to accept they are not everyone’s planner and everyone is not their client. But it feels amazing the moment we accept that.

As you know, we’re big fans of you and your work. For our readers who might not be as familiar what can you tell them about what you do?
Relationships, Personalization, and Transparency are the most important elements. These characteristics represent your personality and your business practices. They also engage trust and create a safe environment for your client. Your professional visibility will organically show up depending on how you handle these three elements.

1. Relationships with professionals and your clients
Wedding Planners need to foster trusting, collaborative relationships with other professionals as well as act is liaison between industry professionals and clients. I do this by:
-Checking in with vendors just to see how they are doing even when I don’t need anything from them
-Checking in with clients to see how they are doing and if they want to schedule a call
-Sending vendors and clients holiday, birthday, and anniversary greetings
-Clearly and regularly communicating with vendors regarding the clients’ needs and expectations. Also asking what they need to succeed at the event.
-Providing consistent communication of updated event details in a Googles Doc that they can access 24/7
-Maintaining unlimited accessibility while establishing boundaries
-Actively listening before offering information, solutions, and suggestions.
-Gathering all of the information necessary from my clients in a comprehensive interview/questionnaire at the start of our planning process to create an unforgettable, seamless experience. (and finding commonalities to share with them so they know they aligned with someone who understands them)
-Supporting my vendors throughout planning, fairly representing them, and making sure they are comfortable on site. (When you do this, your calls and emails will be answered, vendors will go above and beyond for you and your client, and they will refer you because they trust you and they know you truly care.)
-Exchanging comments on Instagram posts
-Under-promising and over-delivering, saying what I mean and meaning what I say.
-Strategically creating realistic and comprehensive vision boards, timelines, and floor plans that are shared with everyone involved to create a team approach.
-Networking with professionals and following them on social media
-Attending professional events and seminars/workshops/webinars/conferences
-Connecting professionals with other professionals to elevate their businesses
-Expressing appreciation and gratitude to my vendors, listing specific behaviors/services/etc. that stood out to me and the client.

2 Authenticity is key. People don’t want to feel used or deceived.
Authentic wedding planners aren’t “selling” to potential clients. In my initial email response to inquiries, I personalize every response in my template to address specific items mentioned in their inquiry. This way they know they were heard, I attend to details, and I care about them. I request a phone conversation or video chat to get to know them and their vision to see if I align with their personalities, budget, and desired outcome. Never once do I mention a contract or fees unless asked, as my goal is to engage potential clients in seemingly natural conversation by getting to know them and establishing how I can solve a problem or fulfill a purpose. My goal is to build trust and create an experience based on the couple’s vision, not just what is comfortable and easy for me. In fact, I thrive on a challenge and love to plan events that require me to think outside the box. Couples need to feel like their planner is accessible, honest, informative, knowledgeable, experienced, flexible, established, and supportive. They want to feel like their planner has their back, so. I accommodate my couple’s time zones, work schedules, etc. and offer unlimited communication during our planning journey. By discussing concerns and potential problems, we can plan solutions that work for everyone and avoid stressful, tenuous situations on the wedding day.
On social media, I share unedited and edited photos, behind the scenes footage, photos of me at professional events/seminars/conferences/site visits, and many wedding planning tips regarding a variety of wedding details and elements. This says I am an authentic expert in the industry that people can trust without actually saying I am an expert and seeming like a braggart. It also illustrates I get along well with other professionals in an uncontrived setting and keep current on resources.

3. Transparency is essential. Fostering clear and open communication (ie. pricing) and writing detailed contracts will prevent disputes later on, We live in a very litigious society, so protect yourself and your client with contracts and documented communication. Be honest about additional charges and fees, especially when you are increasing a vendor’s actual cost. I charge a flat fee for my services, list all of my fees in my contract, and detail any additional fees for add-ons in the wedding resume. Vendors send the contracts and invoices to me first for review, especially because I can fix any errors and prevent any issues. Once I approve it, then the actual invoice is shared with my client and they pay the vendor directly for their services. For every client, I create a very detailed wedding resume listing every wedding day detail in Google Docs. They are provided with a link and can access it any time as a commenter, not an editor. This resume is updated in real-time during our meetings, and after any decision or adjustment of information is provided. In my timeline, I clearly communicate timing of every single thing that transpires, from vendor arrival to repurposing flowers and moving chairs to when we start clearing tables and breaking down rentals. My services are outlined in my contract and in the wedding resume, If I am unable to fulfill a request, work with a venue or vendor, or adhere to their budget, I explain that to them. Instead of dismissing potential clients due to an unrealistic initial budget, I inform them of what things truly cost so they are then equipped to make a decision to move forward. My payment plan is established in the contract and wedding resume, and I update it with their vendor payment due dates. I have discovered that my level of transparency often attracts my ideal client, one who perfectly aligns with my personality and business style. If they want something that won’t work with their venue, setting, or budget, I let them know and creatively think of an alternative solution to satisfy them. I can leverage my experiences to create the most desirable outcome, but am always open to trying something new (in fact, I manifest that!).

Most of all, I want my clients’ experience to be different from anything previously experienced. Their celebration should be one-of-a kind and an unforgettable experience on which they will reflect favorably for their lifetime.

What does success mean to you?
Oh…I’m task oriented and a pleaser, so this is a big one. For me, success is an action that makes me and others happy, fulfilled, and accomplished in some way. There are little successes and big successes. Many equate it to monetary or tangible fulfillment, but even those are just different means to the same end – the feeling of fulfillment, happiness, and accomplishment. Some might thing it is achieving a desired outcome, but what if you are successful at something without intent? For something to be successful, it needs to be meaningful. I suppose fulfilling a purpose or need in whatever way that brings joy to the giver and receiver would define success.

Pricing:

• Full Service Planning & Event Design
• Weddings of 50 guests or fewer/from 4200
• Weddings of 99 guests or fewer/from 4750
• Weddings of 150 guests or fewer/from 5500
• Weddings of more than 150 guests/from 6000

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.celebrationsbytori.com
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/celebrationsbytori/
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/CelebrationsbyTori/
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/celebrationsbytori
• Twitter: https://x.com/celebrations808
• Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCijzWYD4D2NmmwdOGA3iTdw
• Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/celebrationsbytori/

Image Credits
Chris J. Evans Photography
Eugene Kam Photography
Jana Dillon Photography