Conversations with Ebony Williams

Today we’d like to introduce you to Ebony Williams.

Ebony, we appreciate you taking the time to share your story with us today. Where does your story begin?
I believe in the power of transmutation- engaging in the act of changing, transforming in shape and form. I am a trauma survivor of childhood s*xual abuse, grew up until the age of three with domestic violence between my parents, spent thirteen years in family court, and was raised by a single mother who had me at 19. My life’s work has been rooted in the belief that change and transmutation is possible- that pain/ trauma can be changed into medicine.

I struggled through depression and anxiety from these circumstances as not of my making as well as the natural progression of what it meant to be a teenager for me exploring my identity and coming out as part of the queer community. I struggled to figure out how to be myself in the face of trauma, straddling two cultures (African-American and Guyanese-American) and two religions (Pentecostal and Catholic) all of which told me being queer was wrong, being me was wrong.

It took me a long time to figure out that I am not my trauma. I did this figuring out through working with therapists who held space for all parts of me. I used the arts to discover what I believed, to make meaning of my wounds, and find a place to put them, a way to express them. Writing became a significant part of my journey.

In college, I found it so powerful for me to gain a deeper global perspective by studying sociology and English Literature taking classes that explored Conflict and Genocide, speculative African American fiction, African American History, Asian American History, Immigrants in America, and so much more. Reading Octavia Butler, Tananarive Due, Samuel Delany, Angela Davis, Frank Wu all gave me a critical insight into the world. It put so much of my own existence into perspective where I could see beyond my own pain and recognize the systemic pain of so many. As a result, I worked in higher education off and on in my career first running a women and gender program, a leadership fund and supporting student orgs and leaders. In later higher-ed work I co-led a Queer Resource Center shaping education and advocacy opportunities for students, faculty, and staff.

When I arrived in Los Angles to study Writing at the California Institute of the Arts in 2010 and while I originally planned to continue writing science fiction, I ended up spending the time writing about my family from slavery to my generation and told these stories through the bodies of ragdolls whose wounds stuffing pains get mended, sewn up, undone, and tended to throughout generations. These dolls also show deep creativity, determination, resilience, ancestral gifts all of which I inherited as part of their legacy.

Through writing, I found a need to find a physical process to bring these bodies into the corporeal world. I started teaching the dollmaking process I developed first to young children dealing with community violence then to adults and people of all ages navigating loss/grief, s*xual violence, oppression due to identity, etc. Unknown to me, initially this storytelling process of dollmaking became a way to transform/transmute the wounds our human bodies carry. After one particular workshop and participant disclosure I determined a need to go back to school to learn how to fully hold space for what I found this process brought up. In 2014, I started a second Master’s program this time in Marriage and Family Therapist, specializing in African-American family studies. I would become a therapist myself, a journey I can now recognize I had been on for quite a while already.

Now years later, I still hold space for healing through my dollmaking process having led hundreds of people through it. I also have found so many other ways to walk with folks on their journeys. I am a trauma-informed yoga instructor who coaches organizations and mental health practitioners to develop their own programs. I bring the body into all my work through sound, movement, aiming to foster communication, alignment, and healing between the body and the brain.

I am a social-emotional arts instructor bringing various art modalities into the therapy room as well as in my teaching as I am core faculty in the UCLArts and Healing initiative’s Social Emotional Arts Certificate program.

I also find knowledge sharing key and so I teach in one of the first MFT programs with an LGBTQIA specialization supporting the next generation of therapists see what’s possible in this field and help shape how they view and support people in their wholeness. Lastly, I am a consultant developing trainings, workshops, discussion circles, non-clinical supervision support for educators, non-profit teams, as well as for for-profit/corporate entities bringing together the various rhelms of my life/work: trauma-informed/reducing mental health care, diversity, equity, inclusion work, and Social Emotional Healing modalities especially for those working with trauma-impacted populations and/or organizational trauma.

This may all seem like a mish-mosh of a career but it feels to me like a deeply intentional tapestry woven together by my childhood hope that something had to exist beyond the pain. There had to be more than the trauma. My work as a therapist in private practice, as an educator, as a consultant all aim to land folks some of that hope, to provide a wider lens by which to see and even value themselves and whatever they need to reshape their worlds. My job is to hold onto the vision that they as individuals, as a couple, as an organization, as a team can be well and thrive with the internal and external resources they need to meet challenges and change as these are both inevitable in life.

While it is important to acknowledge and hold space for the bumps in the road and the presence of mud on your shoe, that is never all there is. Our brains and our pains are really good, excellent even in convincing us that that’s all there is and will ever be. Yet it’s so important we train our minds to see more especially in the challenging moments because when we can’t depression, anxiety, and deep hopelessness/powerlessness can take root. If there’s any insight I might offer to someone in struggle, I would say please recognize and acknowledge when you are in the mud. Know that there are two constants in life suffering or challenges and change. We will face challenges in life no matter how much we try to avoid them and nothing stays the same forever which means change is inevitable. Your circumstances can change. It’s crappy to even be in any state of suffering and yet joy has to become a choice. You also get to make certain choices when you choose Joy which may not show immediate results but let’s just consider maybe you’ve decided that supervisor who is verbally abusive to you does not bring you joy and you start to recognize that you deserve joy and that change can happen, you may start to seek other options and give yourself time to find a new job rather than sinking into the mud internalizing this supervisor’s words as true, feeling you aren’t good enough, and as if you will be stuck there forever. When you see change as possible and know you deserve joy you can start to take action, and set causes that will blooms. You can see the light and the lotus that can emerge in your life. The struggle is not the only thing, the pain is not the only thing that exists on the road. The possibilities also lay ahead if only we can find the space to see them.

As you know, we’re big fans of you and your work. For our readers who might not be as familiar what can you tell them about what you do?
It is a bit difficult to strictly categorize my work in one area but they fit within four areas.

THERAPIST: I am a Marriage and Family Therapist and Trauma Specialist in private practice. I bring in a range of modalities to support the clients I work with that range from social-emotional arts, somatic practices, and empowerment approaches, to name a few. I specialize in trauma and in LGBTQIA+ affirming therapy and in interpersonal violence, intergenerational trauma, racial trauma, anxiety, and many other areas of need.

CONSULTANT: I am a consultant working with schools, non-profit and for-profit organizations support workplace wellness. I offer custom-designed strategies to address various challenges by bringing together best practices in trauma-informed/reducing care, diversity equity inclusion and belonging, as well as using social emotional arts and other strategies that benefit various populations. Some examples of my work has included offering mental health training/workshops for medical and mental health agencies, designing workshop series for school districts that provide a trauma-informed and culturally humble framing for how to address issues of racism and inclusion with students. For non-profits working with system-impacted populations (foster-care youth, survivors of s*x trafficking), I have offered non-clinical supervision (professional development) supporting staff in recognizing what they may be seeing in those they work with and ways to navigate these challenges. In other work, I have designed a 6 months long program for staff to engage in both learning about and discussing various issues as they pertain to DEIB topics to create a foundational understanding and a sense of belonging amongst all staff and in their global work. I also design and lead/facilitate staff professional retreats and strategic planning meetings/retreat work.

EDUCATOR: I am also an educator who designs and leads workshops/trainings as well as teaching in a Cultural Psychology Master’s program for Marriage and Family Therapy. I also teach in the Social Emotional Arts Certificate Program through UCLArts and Healing Initiative program.

ARTIST/CREATIVE: Lastly, I am a writer and creative using art in its various forms as well as supporting the design of trauma-informed yoga programs led by therapists and mental health professionals.

Can you talk to us about how you think about risk?
I have a 3-year-old and it terrified me when she started to walk at 10 months, then climb, then jump off of everything that stood in her way. I vacillated between anxious and intrusive thoughts that she might fall and break something and a desire to not hinder her. In my heart, I have been in awe of her bravery and would like to imagine she got some of her brave spirits from me. I have come to know that taking risks are an essential part of truly living and finding your way in this world. The risks I have taken have included applying to grad school and moving across the country with my Maltese, Joni, never having visited California. It includes returning to grad school a second time knowing I would have to do a year-long unpaid training. In preparation, I left my salaried job in higher education to become self-employed offering workshops teaching doll making and other training. As a licensed therapist with a 5-month-old child in early 2020, I left my job as a trauma therapist to build my private practice and join a group practice so I could be home with her during the week. Covid began and it wasn’t until my child was 2 years old and in an outdoor school that I could really take the risk to build my consulting business. As my life expanded and grew I found more reasons to do the practical and safe thing for my family and yet I took risks. I left steady yet underpaid positions to build something new and shape my own path. I am humbled that each time I have taken a risk, I have found success and increasing my income, aligning with my passions while having the flexibility to pick up my child after school and be present with her during school breaks.

Now pregnant with my second child, I want my children to know that I believe in living a purpose-driven life and as a result, the risks that I took were all purpose-driven. They have been rooted in living a life that is about embracing the power of healing self and others through processes that include writing, doll making, therapy, movement, and knowledge sharing. My risks all led me from one healing process to the next and along the way I found my own healing and tools to be of support to others. I would tell my children and anyone who is unsure to take risks, to be intentional and strategic in that risk-taking, and to be brave about it.

Pricing:

• $200.00 (Individual Therapy)
• $250.00 (Couples Therapy)
• $2,500.00+ (Workshops/Trainings)
• $550-650.00 monthly (Non-clinical Team Supervison Support/ Check-ins)
• Price Varies (Retreats)

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.rootwellnesshealing.com/
• Instagram: rootwellnesshealing47
• Other: https://www.ebonymawilliams.com/

Image Credits
Personal Photo: Ebony Williams Images #1-4: Ebony Williams Image #5: Sheri Johnson