Check Out Esmée Silverman’s Story

Today we’d like to introduce you to Esmée Silverman.

Hi Esmée, thanks for joining us today. We’d love for you to start by introducing yourself.
I co-led the March for Queer & Trans Youth Autonomy while on psychedelic mushrooms. This is my story.

In December of 2017, my first year of high school, I broke down in the boy’s locker room. It was a cultivation of a painful year of mental health struggles, painful breakups, and coming to terms with a fact I could no longer hide from: I was a transgender woman.

My journey begins and, from the perspective of this story, ends with activism. After my breakdown, I joined my school’s Gender Sexuality Alliance for support during my coming out journey. In that first meeting, I found not only that support, but I found something that had been lacking in my life until that point. I found a purpose, and that purpose, bringing safety, autonomy, and joy to queer & trans youth worldwide, would lead me to co-organizing a nationwide March for Queer & Trans Youth Autonomy, modeling for Hollister, appearing in a Disney Channel commercial, and setting up my high schools first international pronoun day celebration, all in the name of making sure queer & trans youth never had to go through the suffering I did.

My first taste of high-profile activism work was with GLSENs National Student Council. I was a senior when I was accepted, and to say I was thrilled would be an understatement. I screamed so loud my mom had to run over and make sure I was ok, and for good reason. After three years of organizing within the Oliver Ames High School GSA, three years of pouring my mind, body, and soul into making my high school safer for LGBTQ+ students, three years of commitment to the Massachusetts GSA State Leadership Council, my work had led me to one of the most high-profile LGBTQ+ youth councils in the country.

As a member of the National Student Council, I modeled for Hollister, appeared in a Disney Channel Commercial, testified for an expansion of Title IX policy to include gender identity and expression, and made so many incredible friends. I still talk to many of them today.

Truthfully, my activism work has never been about gaining fame or fortune, it’s always been about the people. I love people! That’s why I co-founded Queer Youth Assemble in 2021, to create spaces for queer & trans & questioning youth to make friends and build community. My activism philosophy has always been rooted in human connection. The more people we know, the more people we impact, and the more we introduce communities to our ideas and values, the more those ideas and values will spread.

Since it’s founding, Queer Youth Assemble has hosted dozens of events across the country, created hundreds of resources, presented at schools and conferences across the country, and, most recently, co-led the Nationwide March for Queer & Trans Youth Autonomy, an entirely grassroots movement uniting queer & trans & questioning youth across the country under the common ideas of safety, autonomy, and joy.

In terms of the history of the March for Queer & Trans Youth Autonomy, I was the one who originally came up with the idea at a QYA event, but I take no credit for the success of this march. That credit goes to the hundreds of thousands of queer & trans youth across the country who organized, participated, and marched alongside us (special shoutout to Alia Cusolito and Faith Cardillo for their organizing roles). They are the true heroes.

It should also be noted that this was not a Queer Youth Assemble protest, this was a protest by queer & trans youth, for queer & trans youth. Of the hundreds of marches that took place across the country on March 31st, Queer Youth Assemble was only responsible for the organizing of the one in Washington DC.

This is where the story gets weird, or iconic if you ask my friends. As one of the primary organizers of the Washington DC March, I was invited to participate in it, but being a broke college student, I was forced to sacrifice on parts of the travel. So I boarded a Spirit Airlines flight with a 9 hour nighttime layover in Las Vegas. Since I had turned 21 a few weeks before, I decided to gamble a bit because hey, it’s Vegas. After losing 7 dollars to the airport slot machines and being kept awake by an hour-long emergency alarm test, I boarded my flight to DC, vowing to never play the airport slot machines again.

My flight landed in DC the day before the march. A kind dyke couple gave me a room to stay in for the duration of the march. The kindness nearly brought me to tears.

For the next part of the story, please keep in mind, I was awake for the past 24 hours, so I needed something to take the edge off before the big day. That night, I was gifted some magic mushrooms and decided to take them late into the night. The day that followed was easily the best yet most chaotic of my life.

The amount of love and gratitude I felt during the march was unreal. Seeing thousands of people show up for someone you organized is truly a feeling in it of itself, but seeing everyone show up not out of hatred, but out of love, that was easily the best moment of my life. My mind was racing as we started marching from Union Station to the US Capitol, I truly couldn’t believe this was finally happening. Regardless of if it was the shrooms or not, I was euphoric.

One behind the scenes tidbit that many people don’t know about the march is that the speaking order was still being finalized the day of the march. I had originally planned on going somewhere in the middle, but to allow more diverse voices the opportunity to speak in front of the media, I decided to go last. When I finally got up on stage to speak, the crowd was electric, even after an hour and a half of speakers. I was in awe.

I consider the speech I gave to be the best one I’ve ever given, discussing the need to unite behind safety, autonomy, and joy in order to advance the queer & trans youth community. And I did it all fluently! The response was a standing ovation, and to add to the overwhelming love and energy I was feeling at the time, my favorite song started playing as I stood there, making peace signs at the audience while my friends and co-organizers gathered around me. Easily the best moment of my life.

After the march, I was laying on the ground taking everything in when I was approached by a march attendee. They asked to lay with me and I said yes. I have a lot of favorite moments from the march, but that moment stands out. How wholesome such a simple act of kindness and solidarity can be. It makes me wonder, what if everyone in the world acted like this person?

After sleeping off the drugs and the exhaustion from the march, I hopped into the back of a van the next morning and hitched a ride to my hometown in Massachusetts, ending my story in the same town it began in. A town that helped me go from anxious high school student to renowned community organizer.

And that was that. The March for Queer & Trans Youth Autonomy. The best day of my life.

Alright, so let’s dig a little deeper into the story – has it been an easy path overall and if not, what were the challenges you’ve had to overcome?
I was born 3 months premature, something that even to this day still affects me. Sure, I’m over the asthma attacks I had as a kid, but I am extremely sensitive to drugs and medication, I have severe ADHD, my memory sometimes fogs up, I get seasonal affective disorder during the winter months, and was forced to repeat preschool.

The road certainly has not been a smooth one, as a high school first year I was hurt. I hurt people because of it, It was never intentional but I still did, and that is a huge motivation for my work. I take full accountability for the harm I caused, and steive every day to ensure that not only I am growing and treating others better, but others are as well.

What all that taught me is that life is not a smooth journey, it is one full of ups and downs. What makes life bearable though are the people. My family, partner, friends, and everyone who has helped me along this journey have supported me during these challenges, and I owe them my infinite thanks.

As you know, we’re big fans of you and your work. For our readers who might not be as familiar what can you tell them about what you do?
I am a non-binary peace activist. I am a non-binary youth rights activist

I specialize in community organizing, safe s*x practices, bridging the divides between opposing sides, transformative justice, and the normalization of queer & trans youth identities. I guess you could say I am a leader in today’s counterculture movement.

I am known for co-organizing the March for Queer & Trans Youth Autonomy, and appearing in several high-profile activism ventures, such as modeling for Hollister and appearing in a Disney Channel commercial.

I’m most proud of all the people I’ve gotten to know, and the people who say I’ve touched their lives. All I want is to help people and make them happy, and the fact I can do that as a career is phenomenal.

I dedicate a large part of my work to uplfting those most marginalized in this country, including BIPOC, AAPI, disabled people, and the working class. I’ve worked behind the scenes on several protests in regards to anti-racism work. Truthfully, its my favorite work to do, standing in solidarity with others and supporting people.

What sets me apart from others is my energy. It is electric and always on. Everyone I’ve ever met tells me I’m one of a kind, and that is due to not only my electric personality, but my commitment to supporting others and bringing happiness to people’s lives. This is not just a job for me, it’s life.

Can you tell us more about what you were like growing up?
I was not the easiest kid to get along with, very stubborn and insistent that my point of view was the right one. But beyond that, I have always been labeled as a creative visionary, someone with lots of creative solutions and a big heart.

Interest-wise, I’ve always been into video games, the obligatory ADHD coping mechanism. I’ve loved music since I could first hear, with Pink Floyd and the Grateful Dead topping my personal charts. Writing came later to me as a way to cope with my depression, and today I write tons of queer & trans movie and TV scripts, only this time around I do it for fun.

I’ve always wanted to change the world since I was a kid, and one of the ways I’ve done that was by bringing humor to otherwise challenging circumstances (I tried making a joke at my grandfather’s funeral when I was 6, it is brought up constantly by my family). I don’t believe humor can be brought to all situations, but it’s a powerful tool that can be used to grieve and even motivate people during tough times.

Contact Info:

• Website: queeryouthassemble.org
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/queeryouthassemble/

Image Credits
Andrew Caballero-Reynolds / AFP