Hidden Gems: Meet Chaille DeFaria of The BFPA Resource Center

Today we’d like to introduce you to Chaille DeFaria.

Hi Chaille, so excited to have you with us today. What can you tell us about your story?
I moved to LA in 1993 to pursue my career as a singer-songwriter and actor under my maiden name, Chaille Percival. I sang on numerous sessions for jingles, tv and film and appeared on camera as well. My last big couple of accolades was playing Diane Dane in That Thing You Do, written and directed by Tom Hanks as well as opening up for Kenny Loggin’s on tour. In 2013 after raising 3 boys, I was feeling called to use my voice differently. Ever since I was 15, I’ve struggled with a hair-pulling disorder called Trichotillomania. It is a BFPA (Body-Focused Process Addiction) and includes other behavioral disorders like skin picking, nail biting to name a few. I was steeped in shame and comparison for years and often struggled to show up in the world. When I learned that I was not alone, I became very involved with the community and was on the board of directors for The TLC Foundation for BFRBs.

I decided to get certified in coaching and began my extensive training at The Co-Active Training Institute followed by other training and certifications in Neuroscience and Relational Trauma. I have attained my ACC (Associate Certified Coach), PCC (Professional Certified Coach) and now my MCC (Master Certified Coach). It’s the highest accreditation there is in coaching recognized by ICF (International Coaching Federation). I am also a Daring Way™ Facilitator of Dr. Brené Brown’s research. In my past 10-plus years in private practice, I coach my clients on topics such as mental wellness, workplace anxiety, conflict resolution, interpersonal relationships just to name a few. I bring extensive training and coaching addressing underlying issues like anxiety, process addictions, relational trauma, shame, comparison and perfectionism. I coach the whole person, both personal and business life.

Alright, so let’s dig a little deeper into the story – has it been an easy path overall and if not, what were the challenges you’ve had to overcome?
My deep struggle with self-acceptance and not being good enough. Always reaching for perfection, where you think you’ve arrived but then that voice inside tells you that you can do it better… never realizing that the opposite of perfectionism was striving to be my best self. I have learned that being vulnerable takes being brave and you can’t be brave unless you are vulnerable. Comparison was and still is the thief of happiness and joy. These are all hard lessons but attainable. It’s a practice. I have learned what it feels like to be enough but it is a daily commitment.

Appreciate you sharing that. What should we know about The BFPA Resource Center?
I am known for coaching and consulting and for being a Certified Daring Way™ Facilitator of Brené Browns research. However, the big upcoming news is that my colleague, Karen Pickett LMFT and I are developing a new treatment model for people who suffer from body-focused repetitive behaviors. We have coined a new and more inclusive term called Body Focused Process Addictions (BFPAs). This includes pulling out hair, picking at skin, biting at nails, talking excessively and more. We believe that our model advances the conceptualization and treatment of these disorders leading to better outcomes for sufferers. We believe combining our strengths and expertise as a coach and therapist has taken us to a whole new level of possibility. We will be launching our new website this summer of 2023 – bfparesourcecenter.com. We will have so much to offer from support groups to workshops, coaching, consulting and therapy. My coaching practice and workshops can be found on my website: https://www.chailledefaria.com/

Any advice for finding a mentor or networking in general?
Staying connected to my coaching community. It is a very positive uplifting community. I never feel like I am in competition with anyone, always supported.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://www.chailledefaria.com
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ChailleDeFaria
• Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/chaille-defaria-co-founder-of-the-bfpa-resource-center-540663155/
• Other: https://www.consciouscandc.com

Image Credits
Denise Duff