Today we’d like to introduce you to Dominique Deed.
Dominique, please share your story with us. How did you get to where you are today?
As a kid, I was always taught that you could only have it one way or the other. I was raised completely traditional and there was no negotiation about it. I always doubted myself, because as a kid I was bullied and made fun of. I was constantly going back and forth with my parents from an early age, and I did not have many friends. When I got into the seventh grade, I became super depressed.
I shut down from everyone and questioned my entire existence. Never before in my life did I feel more trapped than at this time. I researched, educated myself and even planned my own suicide. Then one day, I decided that I wanted more out of my life and that no one or nothing would stop me. I went through high school, ready to be done but still enjoyed what I could of it. And while I still had my moments, I was able to fight back and come out ready for the next thing in my life. After I started going to college, I felt like I did back in Junior High; I felt like a ghost. I was just existing. For some reason, I continually dealt with the questions of how to find the purpose in my life that would drive me to be better. I decided that I would take a break from school and completely submerse myself in enjoyment. I started going out more, hanging out with friends, taking trips even going on dates more, and while I was very happy for a couple of years that soon changed, Once again I was in a dark place, I was drinking and driving with no care in the world of what happened to me. I had come to a place where because I could not find any motivating factor in my life to keep me going, I was ready to give up, and I felt like I had.
Then August of 2018, I found out I was pregnant and my life turned upside down. I was scared out of my mind to tell my parents, but even more scared with what was going to happen. When I first found out, I battled with the thoughts of abortion because I knew I could not do it, then after an emotional conversation with my sister, I broke down and my heart changed. This was the first time in a long time that I did not feel alone. This was the first time in a long time that I felt close to God again – I felt him. When I saw the first ultrasound of my son, I broke down and thanked God for giving me another shot at my life. He gave me a blessing that so many want and cannot have, even in the middle of the lifestyle I had chosen. My parents came around a little bit after I told them, and they reminded me that the future of our lives would depend on me, I had started modeling years before this but never truly dedicated myself to it fully. After I got induced with my son and a long week in the NICU with him, I decided to go back to school and to full immerse myself in the things I wanted to make happen to better myself for my son.
Since I decided that I wanted the very best, I have done more shows than I have ever done with some amazing models, I have had all new opportunities, and I was able to finish school and receive my bachelor’s degree. I hear so many moms tell me that I cannot have it all now because I am a mom, and I have gotten into arguments because to me that sounds like a cop out. Life is what you make it and what you put into it. I decided that I wanted better for us, and while I am a statistic, I will not settle knowing someone is looking up to me. I firmly believe that so many moms settle in the bad relationships thinking it’ll benefit their kids, or they settle with the job because they feel like they’re only ‘mom’, the thing I have learned through having my son is that I am still young and still me. I decide what happens from this point on and I want to sit back one day and tell my son I was able to have it all with hard work and focus, regardless of what people around me told me.
Now while I do not own my own business or am not making a million dollars. I am raising a son, and a single mother – and I know there are moms out there that just need some encouragement that your baby is your second chance… give it you’re all!
We’re always bombarded by how great it is to pursue your passion, etc – but we’ve spoken with enough people to know that it’s not always easy. Overall, would you say things have been easy for you?
Oh, not at all. The biggest obstacle in my life was myself. I settled in different parts in my life, relationships, friendships, jobs, etc because I thought it was easier. I was selling myself short because the girl next to me was, and when I held my son I decided enough was enough. It is hard to look at classmates or old friends and envy where they are at in their lives but it is a process. All I keep learning is to fall in love with the process and embrace the struggles because they’re strengthening you for the next thing.
What were you like growing up?
Growing up, I was always extremely social. I loved to reach out and help people when I could. I was, some would say, way too nice. I was the weird kid that people whispered about, but when people needed a friend, I was that person. I always tried to see the better side of people no matter what they did or how they treated me.
I played sports, I tried to get involved. I loved music and learning new things. I loved and still do love hearing all about other people’s experiences growing up and why they have done things certain ways in their lives. I do have to say many times I was quick to give in, which would get me in trouble a lot. I was never the smart kid or funny kid, but I would say that I genuinely loved the people in my circle.
Image Credit:
Chris Prada, Will Reflex
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