Life & Work with Stephanie Peraza

Today we’d like to introduce you to Stephanie Peraza.

Stephanie, we appreciate you taking the time to share your story with us today. Where does your story begin?
It’s truly been an incredibly transformative time in my life right now. Since the last time I was featured here in October 2020, my life took really unexpected turns. In August 2021, I went through a really definitive and sad breakup. I felt lost and unfulfilled…I think that’s something that’s inevitable for anyone in their mid to late 20s. I had lost one of my best friends and I essentially had to piece my life back together again. At 27, just as I had done so many times in the past during those volatile, self-loathing years, I had the task of re-evaluating my life and repurposing it. I always knew I want to be a writer and filmmaker…that was the easiest step. That was something that was in my heart. It felt innate. But then what? After months of quiet introspection, my best friend, Madison, finally convinced me to do something that we had been discussing for years. In January 2022, I made the decision to apply to graduate school at USC. This is something that was in the back of my mind for a long time but I never took the leap. I was glad to be done with school, I had absolutely no interest in slipping into academia once again…I thought that part of my life was over. It was Madison who really pushed the benefits of the School of Cinematic Arts (SCA) on me. I finally realized that it was time to stop being dismissive of what grad school could offer me. I had to take a chance on myself again.

And so began the endeavor of applying. It was really intimidating. I don’t remember exactly how I came up with the idea of Don’t Look Back (2022) but I know I had a draft by late April. Don’t Look Back is a short film about a young woman whose life is suddenly catapulted into instinctive survival one fateful night. I think I took the heartache from my breakup and channeled that into the short. I wanted something with substance, something that would challenge me. I used violence to depict how I felt on the inside: full of rage, confusion, and disillusion. My protagonist, Alma (played to perfection by Brissa Ramirez), represented me and how I would react in a flight or fight situation. As a creative exercise, I also very deliberately gave Alma no dialogue because I wanted her actions to speak for themselves. That short film served as a vehicle to interpret my anguish and showcase what kind of filmmaker I want to be: bold.

Fast forward to today. Don’t Look Back served as my submission film to USC but has still not formally premiered to outside audiences. I have been researching various local film festivals that I want to submit to. I’m really looking forward to sharing it with the world! It was the most challenging and rewarding thing I have done so far. I wrote and directed it, cast it, executive produced it, and set-dressed it. Madison was my cinematographer and my brother, Miguel was my editor. I even cast my cousin, Kevin, in a supporting role. We shot during the summer over the course of two days. It was a labor of love with all the sincerest support from my friends and family.

On October 20, 2022, I received my acceptance letter to USC SCA. I’m going to be pursuing a Master’s in Film and Television Production. What a whirlwind…like I said before, definitely a transformative time for me right now.

We all face challenges, but looking back would you describe it as a relatively smooth road?
No. I thought I had my life figured out after I graduated college in 2016. Looking back, I do believe I held myself back from pursuing my dreams much sooner. I spent a lot of time dabbling with drugs and drinking excessively, thinking that my partying went hand in hand with my age. Then the years kept dissolving into one another and I reached a point in time when I was still working at a pizza place and in no way closer to becoming a filmmaker than when I moved back to the San Fernando Valley all those years ago. I used to find comfort in my relationship with my ex and was set on having the white picket fence and really committing myself to being someone’s something—wife or eventually, mother. While I still have faith in love and do hope to find someone right for me one day, it’s definitely not my priority anymore. I’ve had to overcome my own insecurities and fear of failure, especially when it comes to my lack of technical skills in regard to filmmaking. I still feel like the least intelligent person in the room sometimes.

That’s just my own head getting in my own way.

I can confidently acknowledge that I suffer from manic depression and I am finding ways to heal from my trauma, whether it is tethered to my family, past relationships, negative self-image, alcoholism, drug addiction, or abuse. These are all things that I have dealt with and continue to cope with but I refuse to allow any of these things to stop me from doing what I love. I just want to live and breathe through art. I want to tell stories people can relate to. My biggest struggle, I would say, has been overcoming my own demons. I still need to remind myself to take it one day at a time. Overall, I think I needed the wayward years; they taught me about who I am, who I want to become, and ultimately, what I value most in life: stories and authenticity.

Thanks for sharing that. So, maybe next you can tell us a bit more about your work?
I most recently finished Don’t Look Back, which was my first short film since Valley Malaise (2018). I am currently developing another mystery/horror short titled Eden which was originally intended to be part of a scrapped anthology series. I have also been working on a semi-autobiographical coming-of-age script about a young woman living in the Valley. I definitely want to maintain creative momentum, especially before I begin school in January.

In my USC personal statement, I wrote: “I want to mold cinematic collages…As an auteur, my vision is to curate a collection of stories where the Valley is a prominent character. This work would contain people that are optimistic, foolish, and generous. They are spiritual vagabonds navigating a very unforgiving world. They are people like me”. I think what will set me apart from other screenwriters or directors will be my dedication to this Valley-centric body of work. I am most proud of knowing that my stories are reflective of my environment and bilingual culture.

Can you talk to us about how you think about risk?
I believe in calculated risk-taking. I think it’s a necessity for people to have an internal barometer for what risks they’re willing to take. I believe this is especially true for artistic individuals. I think I took a risk on myself recently by doing something that I adamantly said I wouldn’t do just a few years ago. Graduate school is my way of taking a chance at my own creativity. It allows me the space to collaborate like I never have before.

Sometimes it really pays off to think outside the box. The moment when it feels most scary to jump is the exact moment that you jump.

Contact Info:

• Instagram: @mamakillabee

Image Credits
Sabrina Sharifi, Madison Stonefield, and Stephanie Peraza