Jessica Carlos of Woodland Hills on Life, Lessons & Legacy

We recently had the chance to connect with Jessica Carlos and have shared our conversation below.

Jessica, it’s always a pleasure to learn from you and your journey. Let’s start with a bit of a warmup: What’s more important to you—intelligence, energy, or integrity?
Integrity, hands down. Out of the three traits stated, it is the one trait that cannot be bought or supplemented. If you are not naturally intelligent, you become intelligence by studying, going to school, reading, etc. If you are low energy, like most Americans, there are medications, supplements, and my personal fave, espresso, to help provide more energy. But integrity is so pivotal to a person’s character and it’s essential, you either have it or you don’t. And if you don’t, I would not want to have someone in my life who lacks integrity, whether it be a business associate, friend, or romantic partner.

Can you briefly introduce yourself and share what makes you or your brand unique?
My name is Jessica Carlos, and I founded my own law firm in March 2023 which solely focuses on family law. These days, I feel more like a part-time lawyer and full-time mom, and I appreciate that work-life balance. I am so grateful I have the flexibility to do what I love professionally while not compromising valuable years with my daughter. I think the human-side of me also makes me a much better advocate, specifically in my area of law, as my clients are parents and coparents just like me. Divorce can be so devastating because it’s a loss and a forced new beginning, but 95% of my clients end up better and happier at the end of it.

Great, so let’s dive into your journey a bit more. What did you believe about yourself as a child that you no longer believe?
As a child and bred overachiever (eldest daughter and parentified child syndrome), I believed I need to be the best at everything. I treated life as a checklist of things I needed to accomplish in perfect order, or I would not be happy. If I got into USC and then my dream law school, I would reach all my goals. I would be good enough and I would be successful. However, life has humbled me with unexpected twists and turns that have made me stronger and actually happier than I expected. In these last two years, I have finally learned to be “ok” with not being in control. Being in control at all times can be exhausting! It is much easier to go with the flow in the general direction you want to be and trust that the universe will do the rest.

Was there ever a time you almost gave up?
After my first year of law school, I almost decided to give up. I became pregnant the second semester of my 1L year, and was not sure if I could be a mom while attending law school. Law school already required so much of my time and efforts that I could not imagine how I could finish with a newborn/infant. Simultaneously, law school was not at all what I had picture. I attended the very prestigious NYU School of Law and assumed it would be a dream come true. I had made it, I was at a Top 10 law school, borderline Ivy League; but it turned out to not be what I wanted. I was disillusioned and thought maybe this meant being a lawyer was not for me.

I think our readers would appreciate hearing more about your values and what you think matters in life and career, etc. So our next question is along those lines. What are the biggest lies your industry tells itself?
You are required to work for a firm or in “big law” to be successful and earn a living. The reality is that firm life is not conducive to work life balance. You will be overworked and underpaid. This is true for those that work for firms, at least. It is the reason I left my last firm. Firms “bank” on inexperienced and naive attorneys to bill 1500-1800 hours per year while billing $400/hr on average, making the firm over half a million dollars; but, the firm only pays the attorney a salary of $150,000. If you do the math, on average, associates earn less than 1/3 of what they bill for the firm. The incentives of holiday parties or office lunches are nice, but they don’t pay the bills, at least not in LA. And the reality is, you can definitively be successful without working yourself to the bone and working for a firm.

Okay, we’ve made it essentially to the end. One last question before you go. Are you doing what you were born to do—or what you were told to do?
I had this conversation with my therapist a few months ago and a light bulb went off! She said, “oh of course you would become a lawyer given your childhood. You’ve spent your whole life defending yourself against a narcissist.” I had never put two and two together to come up with that myself. I never realized that most 8 year olds don’t dream of becoming an attorney. For example, when I asked my daughter, she said she wanted to be a hairstylist. Even so, I do think this is the perfect job for me and I cannot imagine doing anything else.

Contact Info:

• Website: https://jlclawapc.com
• Instagram: https://instagram.com/jlclaw_
• Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jessica-carlos-889665b4
• Yelp: https://www.yelp.com/biz/jlc-law-san-fernando-valley
• Other: https://www.tiktok.com/@jlclaw_