Inspiring Conversations with Thomas Dunleavy of Three Waves Psychotherapy

Today we’d like to introduce you to Thomas Dunleavy.

Alright, so thank you so much for sharing your story and insight with our readers. To kick things off, can you tell us a bit about how you got started? 
Absolutely! I’m a midlife career changer and I’ve sort of taken an unconventional path to where I am today. Before becoming a psychotherapist and founding my practice, Three Waves Psychotherapy, I was in senior leadership at a high fashion modeling agency in New York City for 14 years. Transitioning from a career in fashion to psychotherapy might seem like a leap, but the truth is that the two fields come together in more ways than you might think. 

One of the great privileges of my career in the fashion industry was having the opportunity to support my models to navigate the rollercoaster ride of such a demanding, raw, and exciting field. Sounds a bit like life, doesn’t it? So, with my models, we celebrated the highs and weathered the lows together and I do the same with the clients at my therapy practice. Moments of human connection and authenticity, whether with my models from the past, strangers I pass on the streets, or with my therapy clients today, make life really interesting and fulfilling for me. 

I reached a point where I knew it was time for a new chapter, not only professionally but personally. I needed to shake things up, and as a New Yorker, Los Angeles seemed completely different from my world on the East Coast. From the weather to the palm trees to the culture to the energy, LA was everything that I was looking for in a life change. So, in my late 30s, I did it! I resigned from my career in fashion, went to USC for my Master of Social Work degree, and dedicated the next several years of my career to supporting people with severe and persistent mental health concerns in Skid Row and in community mental health. 

From there, it was time to make my next dream a reality: I founded my private practice, Three Waves Psychotherapy, so I can further my specialization in the mindfulness-based therapies (including Dialectical Behavior Therapy, Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, and Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy). I had also always dreamed of being a business owner so to be in a place today where I see myself doing exactly what I set out to do is a pretty powerful and cool moment for me. 

Can you talk to us a bit about the challenges and lessons you’ve learned along the way? Looking back, would you say it’s been easy or smooth in retrospect?
The short answer is that it absolutely has not been the easiest path! Is any road ever without its twists, bumps, or delays? The gift of hindsight, though, is pretty golden, so now that I’m on the other end of all these life changes and sacrifices, I can see the synchronicity in everything that happened, which brought me to where I am today. I can connect how following one hunch led me to walking through a door that opened, which led me to meeting certain people, which then helped more opportunities to become possible for me. 

Being able to step back and see how each of these struggles and successes were not only essential but useful helps take the bite out of the inevitable hardships we all go through in life, don’t you think? I do a lot of this “connect the dots” work with my clients so we can understand with compassion what led us to what we’re experiencing. From this place of acknowledgement and reflection, we can address any missing links that might have been needed if the outcome wasn’t what we were hoping for or give credit to what contributed to us getting what we want so we can do more of that going forward. A motto of mine is to “Take what’s helpful, learn from and let go of what’s not, and keep putting one foot in front of the other either way.” 

Appreciate you sharing that. What should we know about Three Waves Psychotherapy?
I’m a mindfulness-based therapist and founder of Three Waves Psychotherapy, which is an online practice specializing in the “third wave” behavioral therapies: Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), and Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy (MB-CT). Even though my office is in West Hollywood, I can see clients anywhere in California, thanks to telehealth! Most of my clients come to me looking for help managing intense emotions (especially fear and anger), or to learn practical techniques to use when overwhelmed by thoughts. I have a particular clinical interest in the treatment of Borderline Personality Disorder, Anxiety/ Panic Disorders, and other trauma-related conditions, especially within the LGBTQ+ community. 

Three Waves Psychotherapy offers adherent Comprehensive DBT, which is an evidence-based intensive treatment program created to help build a life worth living. My practice also offers DBT Skills Group, which teaches practical approaches for getting through difficult times, managing emotions, improving relationships, and living more fully in the present moment. I absolutely love teaching, so in addition to DBT Skills Group, I also offer family skills coaching for families who have an emotionally sensitive loved one, and I’ve created a 14-week Cognitive Behavioral Therapy group that helps clients form a new relationship with their thoughts. There’s a lot going on at my practice, and I wouldn’t have it any other way! 

Let’s talk about our city – what do you love? What do you not love?
I’ve been fortunate to live in quite a few major cities and I can fairly say that LA is incredibly unique and filled with so many paradoxes. There’s an energy here that I haven’t felt in other places. It’s hard for me to put my finger on it, and that only adds more to the mystery, enigma, and allure of LA. 

Of course, we have this laid-back, beach vibe that a lot of people associate with LA, while at the same time, world-influencing business and hustle towards dreams happening every day, too. You could be baking in the desert for one minute (which I absolutely love to do), but then take a drive only a couple hours away and find yourself skiing! And for all the sunshine, blue skies, and smiles there’s also a grit and restless uneasiness happening too. Like something can happen at any moment, maybe it’s the fault line, maybe it’s trapped energy from the golden age of Hollywood, who knows! What I do know for sure is that I absolutely love LA, Southern California, and the culture here that I’m learning more about every day. 

Contact Info:

• Website: www.threewavespsychotherapy.com
• Instagram: www.instagram.com/threewavestherapy/ @threewavestherapy