Today we’d like to introduce you to Dr. Lauren Cook.
So, before we jump into specific questions, why don’t you give us some details about you and your story.
I never wanted my age to stop me from being brave. When I was 18, I read Gretchen Rubin’s book, The Happiness Project, and immediately felt inspired by her story. I thought to myself, “Why not reach out to her and see if she’d like to write a teen edition of The Happiness Project with me?” My inner critic told me I was too young to write a book. Who would think I had anything of value to say? But even with my fear, from my dorm room bunk bed, I emailed Gretchen to make my offer. She wrote back in about an hour that she wasn’t interested. I appreciated that she wrote me back all the same!
From this, it spurred a fire in me. I learned that just because someone says no to me, it doesn’t mean that I have to say no to myself. So I started writing and asking my peers what happiness meant to them. Writing my first book became my passion project all throughout college and right before I graduated, my very own book, The Sunny Side Up, was published. Holding it in my hands for the first time was unforgettable.
From there, I began getting opportunities to speak and share with audiences about how they can cultivate more joy in their lives. And as much as I loved doing this, I was quickly seeing how many people were struggling not to be happy, but to just feel okay.
This told me that I had more work to do. As someone who is passionate about taking action, I decided to get my Master’s in Marriage and Family Therapy from USC. I knew I wanted to help couples and families strengthen their relationships, especially from a systems lens. And as much as I loved this work, I felt there was room to continue challenging myself.
I decided to pursue my doctorate in Clinical Psychology at Pepperdine University. It was during this experience that I found my heart’s calling working with young adults and providing education to them about mental health. When you look at the stress level that this upcoming generation is facing—it’s profound. 12 students in our country die every day by suicide and a person dies from an eating disorder every hour. These are just a few from many startling facts. This generation has inherited the challenges of global warming, an opioid epidemic, and years of apparent and hidden social injustice. And yet, I see them rising to the challenge every day. To be there as their therapist and support them in their journey is my greatest gift. I don’t take the privilege lightly and I am humbled to be on the road to becoming a psychologist.
We’re always bombarded by how great it is to pursue your passion, etc – but we’ve spoken with enough people to know that it’s not always easy. Overall, would you say things have been easy for you?
Rejection is a natural part of the journey. I actually welcome rejection because it means I’m trying. It’s a sign that I’m putting myself out there. My first rejection came when Gretchen Rubin turned me down on my book offer. But I decided to let this “no” be the fuel that got my fingers to start and keep typing my own book. It really came full circle for me when I was asked to speak at a national conference and they told me that they were choosing between myself or Gretchen Rubin to keynote their event. To even be considered in the same line-up as her felt like such an honor. That conference ended up choosing me to speak and it turned out to be one of the biggest “yes” opportunities that I’ve gotten thus far. All because I had the courage to write that book and make her rejection into something meaningful.
My second and third rejection came when I applied to be a speaker with an agency that primarily works with universities. At first, they told me I was too young and my message wasn’t developed enough yet. The second time, they told me that the other candidates were better qualified. I could have easily hung my hat up and said, “Maybe it’s just not meant to be.” But no. My heart told me to keep going. I applied a third time and what do you know, I have now been signed with that speaking agency for over four years. I’ve been able to speak at universities across the country, promoting a message of mental health and teaching students how to ask for help. If I had given up, the thousands of students who needed to hear that information may not have heard it.
I’m sure there are more rejections coming. I hope for them. They are grounding yet motivating to keep on keeping on. It’s all about our perspective on the struggle and I see them as the opportunities that teach me profound lessons.
We’d love to hear more about your work and what you are currently focused on. What else should we know?
One of the beauties of being a therapist, speaker, and author is that I get to do a little bit of everything. I am about to start my postdoctoral training where I’ll be working with the Claremont schools’ students. In my free time though, I’m speaking with corporations, universities, and organizations to provide guidance on mental health training while teaching people how to identify and integrate a values-based life. I’ve also developed an online curriculum for people to learn how make decisions efficiently and effectively since I see so many clients struggle to make purposeful choices in their lives (i.e., Do I stay in that relationship or end it? Do I take that job, stay, or leave it?)
What I’m most proud of in my work is that I bring my real, full, and true self as a therapist. I personally think it’s an outdated notion in therapy to be a blank slate. There’s a lot of thought that therapists shouldn’t ever share their personal lives with the world. And yet, if you go on my Instagram, you’ll see that I not only provide mental health content, I also share my mental health journey and the highs and lows of my life. I want my clients to know that I’m a real human being and I’m right there in it with them. For example, I have a pretty severe phobia of vomit. There’s actually a name for it called emetophobia. Rather than act like my life is “perfect” as a therapist, I own the struggle. I’ve shared about what it’s like to get treatment for my phobia and how I manage it day to day (because yes, it does impact my day to day). I really hope that therapists can show others that we’re not better than anyone else—many of us are wounded healers trying to offer solace to those walking alongside us in the journey.
So, what’s next? Any big plans?
You’re also catching me as I’m about to launch a major brand shift. For the past five years, many people have hired me to speak as “The Sunny Girl” where I have focused primarily on happiness and positive psychology. I even wore a yellow dress every time I spoke! Yes, I have at least ten yellow dresses at this point—I should count! And while I still love these tenets of how to appreciate joy in our lives, my new brand as Dr. Lauren Cook is all about fostering wellness and building a meaningful life. I’m also planning to start a private practice in Pasadena in the next year and the hope is that I can continue working with clients individually while still speaking (whether virtually or on the road).
Pricing:
- Send inquiries to [email protected].
Contact Info:
- Website: www.drlaurencook.com
- Email: [email protected]
- Instagram: drlaurencook
- Other: https://www.linkedin.com/in/laurencook5/
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