Today we’d like to introduce you to Bethany Barton (writer name Bethany Nicole).
Hi Bethany, it’s an honor to have you on the platform. Thanks for taking the time to share your story with us – to start maybe you can share some of your backstory with our readers?
I am an LA-based author, freelance writer, and relationship expert and my story begins where all good stories begin… at the end.
The end of another failed relationship. As I sat on my living room floor, looking around at all the pictures and memorabilia of another failed relationship, I wondered once again where I went wrong and when that person would ever make it right. And then, it dawned on me.
I may never get an apology from that person, and you know what that’s ok. As my concept around forgiveness and self-healing grew, I realized we rarely get the apologies we deserve.
Whether it is from friends, parents, romantic partners, roommates (or in my case all of the above) we can’t go around letting that hold us back. Because in truth, that is all resentment and unreceived apologies do, hold us back. They don’t hurt the other person, they just get added to the already full grudge backpack we carry around with us every day.
Then what’s worse, we take out those resentments and unhealed aspects on the people around us and drag them into our brand new relationships.
So I discovered another way. Self-healing is an inside job and the only one with the right qualifications for it is us.
So I got to work, I put down the grudges and the toxic coping mechanisms and picked up a pen. I began my work of healing and giving myself the apologies I never got by writing them myself. Soon the idea grew and I combined my own and friends’ hilarious and horrible dating and relationship mishaps and began writing apologies for their horror stories.
I added from my own experience and background in social work and knowledge of relationship dynamics and soon my book, Apologies I Never Got, was born.
From there, I have been doing interviews, freelance work, even tarot relationship readings, all for the common goal of helping others (and myself) heal ourselves and our relationships.
Can you talk to us a bit about the challenges and lessons you’ve learned along the way. Looking back would you say it’s been easy or smooth in retrospect?
It has not been an easy road because healing is not easy work. It is intense highs and low lows and prolonged effort and focus on bettering yourself. It took me several methods of healing to find my right fit, including but limited to: talk therapy, regression therapy, past life regression therapy, psychic and tarot readings, EMDR, EFT, Kundalini Yoga, Meditation, Breathwork practices, Yoga Nidra, Mindfulness, and many others.
But I found my healing. (Huge shoutout to the Den Meditation in that process by the way.) Now I work to help others find their path to recovery through the art of forgiveness and learning how to heal their own trauma so they(and we all) can finally let go of the idea that others are responsible for our own inner work.
I have struggled with anxiety, depression, using substances to cope with trauma, and many other difficulties along my healing journey as many do. But with that experience now comes expertise in helping others navigate the same and similar struggles that I did.
Appreciate you sharing that. What else should we know about what you do?
I am known for my dating and relationship expertise.
I write for many freelance projects including dating and relationship predictions and analysis for dating reality shows such as Married at First Sight and 90 Day Fiance, I write articles and do interviews on contemporary dating practices and issues.
I cover everything from Love Languages to Attachment Theory to dating app drama. I also utilize tarot, astrology, and intuition in my writing and work to help figure out what is blocking individuals’ and couples’ love lives and how they can work past it.
I was recently featured in Los Angeles Entrepreneur Magazine as one of the Top 25 Authors in Los Angeles. I also have poetry and fiction pieces published through various publications.
But my book and my work with relationships is my magnum opus.
In terms of your work and the industry, what are some of the changes you are expecting to see over the next five to ten years?
I think the dating and relationship industry is primed for a rewrite.
The pandemic has shown us that so many things have got to change, including our relationships. So many marriages and relationships did not make it through the pandemic intact. I believe a large part of that is because they were never built on much, to begin with.
Toxic dating culture encourages shallow connections and a “who cares least, wins” attitude. I think we can do better than that.
How we function in society and in the world around us depends a lot on how our personal relationships go, and we need to start recognizing that.
If we can develop healthy intimate relationships with ourselves and partners, we can begin to create strong foundations in our society. We can learn to relate to each other in a more open and healed way, instead of a competitive and contradicting way.
Relationships are mirrors of our own inner work. If we can recognize that and help heal each other within the confines of a relationship instead of tearing each other down, then we can make a lot of things better both within ourselves and the world around us. Relationships are meant to heal, not hurt.
Contact Info:
- Email: [email protected]
- Website: https://www.bethanynicole.com/
- Instagram: @bethanynicoleauthor; @apologiesinevergot
- Twitter: @best2bbethany
- Other: https://www.apologiesinevergot.com
Image Credits
Pic credit: Alana Marie Cheuvront of Alana Marie Visuals/ @alanamarievisuals
