Today we’d like to introduce you to Ashley Uzer.
Ashley, let’s start with your story. We’d love to hear how you got started and how the journey has been so far.
Hi! I’m a writer and blogger and artist. I hesitate to use the term “creator” because I think it’s become such a loaded and overused descriptor, but let’s just say that at any job I’ve had, I’ve always had difficulty choosing a job title to write on my resume — because I do a lot.
I used to want to be a fashion designer, but while studying fashion in undergrad and working one too many tragically unpaid internships, I realized that while I liked making clothes for myself and giving styling tips to friends, I didn’t want to do it for a living. Luckily, I ended up getting another (unpaid) internship at a start-up women’s media company while simultaneously interning in the footwear department at Michael Kors. I assumed I’d be getting coffee, but they asked if I could write, and I said, “sure?” I ended up getting really into it, and when I started writing about sex and dating (which at the time, was mainly just rants), my bosses noticed that my pieces were getting a lot of traffic. Fast-forward to the end of my internship period, and they asked me if they could pay me to freelance for them while I was finishing school. That was what opened my eyes to the fact that I could actually make a (modest) living as a writer, and that it was something I was good at and actually enjoyed. I started freelancing for a few more small outlets while in college (not to mention charging people to write their papers for them for extra cash, lol)—and went on to work full-time at the media company post-grad.
Unfortunately, like most “cool” creative jobs, working full-time at the magazine resulted in me feeling overworked and underpaid. I was still freelancing on the side for extra cash since half my paycheck went to rent in my tiny, windowless, shared NYC apartment. I felt burnt out and unhappy, so I decided to do the thing everyone was doing at the time — freelance full-time and do the “digital nomad” thing. I wanted to write more for me again (although I had never written fully for me before since it was always for work). I ended up moving my stuff back to my parent’s place in DC (I realize I was very privileged to be able to do this!) and I started quickly filling my time with freelance writing gigs while planning lots of trips. I started actually posting regularly on my personal blog, loxandleather.com (I need to change the name since I’m mostly plant-based now—it’s on my to-do list). I started making plans for the first book I want to write. I started learning more about how I actually want to live my life. While freelancing full-time, I was working constantly, some on writing projects I loved, some on boring copywriting projects, some on social media strategy (a new feather I added to my cap after falling into that industry as well).
After nearly two years of bouncing around the globe, burying myself in work, and growing a lot personally and professionally—I felt a bit stuck again. I still wasn’t making much more money than I was in NYC, and I felt that I still wasn’t getting the time to work on projects I was passionate about as often since I was so worried about hitting my monthly income goals. I realized I wanted to make a “home” somewhere, and the only place that really made sense to me was Los Angeles. I started applying to jobs out here because I knew I wouldn’t commit to actually moving across the country unless I had a “reason.” I got a job offer more quickly than anticipated, had a week to move out to LA, found an apartment within two days of getting here — and it has been mostly smooth sailing since!
I am currently working by day as a copywriter and social media manager at a skincare company, and still doing the writing I love — mostly writing about sex and relationships for outlets like HelloGiggles, Galore, VICE— on the side. I’m also more regularly posting on my blog — whether it’s a review of a clothing brand or a manifesto on why I stopped drinking—and trying to make more art (another thing on my to-do list — I love to paint and draw).
I don’t know if I have a “dream job” or an ultimate goal. But I really love social media and writing’s ability to allow me to share my passions for yoga, being sober, being vegan-ish, etc. — and to share my thoughts and advice on modern romance which, let’s be honest, is a shit show for all of us. Sorry that was so long, but I personally love reading people’s stories on how they fell into what they are doing — I’m actually launching a vertical about just that on my blog soon. So, if you have a cool story, get in touch. 🙂
Any advice for other women, particularly young women who are just starting their journey?
I think my #1 advice for women is to always ask for what you’re worth and add tax. Something I learned in the second half of my freelance career is to think about how much you want to charge someone, then ask for more. As women (and probably as freelancers desperate for dough in general) we’re constantly lowering our rates for fear of scaring a client away or whatever—but I noticed that when I quoted a high rate for a project I didn’t really want, the potential client would often accept it, or negotiate down slightly but still end up paying me more than I would’ve asked for if it was a project I really wanted.
I think another thing I learned inadvertently is to — as cliche and corny as it sounds — be true to yourself. I knew that wearing office clothes and trying to fit in with people at Michael Kors wasn’t the right path for me, and by totally being myself and writing (slightly ratchet) dating content for a magazine in a voice that I would’ve used to text my friends, I found a career path that actually has (mostly) worked for me. The creative directors still say that I’m the one who created the voice of that magazine, and it was really just by being authentic to myself at the time. Of course, I’m probably never going to get hired by a government agency because my byline is on articles about sex somewhere on the internet, but realistically that’s not something I would ever be happy doing anyway. You have to be okay with not everyone liking you. It’s definitely good to keep your options open and remember that everything on the internet lives forever, but if you try to fit yourself into a box that isn’t being true to yourself, you will probably end up unhappy (even if you’re making six figures).
Another thing I needed to hear — and still do sometimes — is that you don’t have to have it all figured out when you graduate college, or even when you’re 25 or 30 or 40. You are allowed to change careers, you are allowed to change yourself, change your goals, change your perspective. I was a party girl in college and now I don’t drink. I graduated college magna cum laude, but I decided to do something with my career that I didn’t really need a college degree for. While it’s definitely not a bad idea to make calculated decisions working towards something, we’re human and we change our minds and I think it’s more about the ride than the end destination.
Please tell us more about what you do, what you are currently focused on and most proud of. What do you guys do best? What sets you apart from the competition?
I think what set me apart early in my writing career and something I’m proud of, is that I write in a way that’s super conversational and easy/fun to read— and I talk about real shit that a lot of people aren’t comfortable talking about (especially related to sex and dating).
I was talking to someone recently about the concept of shame and realized that maybe I have very little shame. I’ll write about my relationships on the internet no matter how embarrassing they are—but it also makes me feel connected. Every person who messages me saying they resonated with something I wrote makes me feel less alone and makes me feel fucking good.
In terms of writing, I definitely specialize in writing about sex and dating and that’s probably what most people know me for, but I also cover everything from beauty to health and wellness.
As a business (of myself), I’m really proud of how I’ve been able to put myself out there and find opportunities through social media or referrals. I think when I first went freelance, I actively looked for gigs for about a month before I stopped having to. Everyone that works with me wants to continue working with me. I’m pretty confident in my skills as a writer or a consultant or an employee—I get shit done and I always have a smile on my face while doing it.
Who do you look up to? How have they inspired you?
My great aunt has always been one of the biggest inspirations in my life. I actually wrote about her for HelloGiggles here: https://hellogiggles.
She immigrated here from Turkey with her husband with basically nothing. They both established themselves as radiologists (the doctors who read x-rays, for those who don’t know), and my great aunt went on to be one of the earliest doctors to work on uncovering a lot of the early research on breast cancer. She was the bigger breadwinner, she called the shots in her relationship and at work, she has a wing named after her at Georgetown University hospital—but she never compromised who she was to fit in with the male-dominated medical field. My great aunt, Olcay is her name, and I have a very similar style in that we love bright colors, cheetah print, sexy silhouettes, etc. (I wear a lot of her hand-me-downs still). For her office at Georgetown University, she told the interior decorator she wanted a bright purple desk and she decorated the walls with paintings of the nude female form.
While I pretty quickly realized that I didn’t want to be a doctor (although never say never), she’s been my role model since I was a kid. I’m lucky to have grown up with a ton of strong women surrounding me!
Contact Info:
- Website: loxandleather.com
- Email: a[email protected]
- Instagram: @ashleygiov
- Portfolio: https://ashleyuzer.
contently.com
Image Credit:
Jerry Nguyen and https://www.instagram.com/moreirashots_/
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