Today we’d like to introduce you to R.J. De Rossi
Hi R.J. , it’s an honor to have you on the platform. Thanks for taking the time to share your story with us – to start maybe you can share some of your backstory with our readers?
My work revolves around a single, urgent question: How can we eradicate violence—emotional, physical, and social—so that individuals and communities can truly thrive?
As a child, I witnessed firsthand the devastating impact of violence, much of it tied to addiction. Later, I spent 18 years as an educator working with children labeled as seriously emotionally disturbed. In that time, I saw, up close, the deleterious effects of violence, addiction, and neglect on thousands of young lives. It was heartbreaking. And when the Sandy Hook massacre occurred roughly 30 miles from our school—amid rising gang violence in our own community—I knew I had to get to the bottom of things. I wanted to understand the root causes of this chaos and, more importantly, figure out ways to uproot them.
Over the years, I turned to meditation, nonviolence, diversity training, and collaborative communication for my own personal growth. But now it was time to explore how these tools could transform entire systems. Alongside a colleague, I co-created a schoolwide social-emotional learning program centered on nonviolence, mindfulness, and celebrating cultural diversity through art, music, and food. It was a phenomenal success.
Also, social science now has compelling evidence that when schools, prisons, and workplaces integrate meditation and wellness programs, the results are extraordinary—violence decreases, productivity rises, and both emotional and physical well-being improve.
My lived experience, combined with the research, became my catalyst. I wanted to take this message beyond the classroom—to the streets, to organizations, to any environment where people deserve the chance to flourish. I wrote a book on forgiveness and reconciliation and have since been working with leaders and businesses as an executive coach and trainer.
That’s where it all started for me.
Would you say it’s been a smooth road, and if not what are some of the biggest challenges you’ve faced along the way?
Nothing ever goes smoothly! Everything costs more and takes longer than you planned. But when you know in your bones that you’re on the right path, you keep going.
This work is challenging, but it doesn’t feel like the four-letter word work is supposed to be. It’s invigorating. My parents always said, Do something you love, and everything else will fall into place. It’s been a winding road, but I’m finally on the one with my name on it.
Love has a way of both fueling you forward and mending you when you’re at your wit’s end. And that’s what my work in servant leadership and nonviolence is all about: love.
I don’t claim perfection. Inner peace, empathy, and service are often dismissed as soft skills, overshadowed by more technical, “hard” skills like tech and operations. But in reality, the so-called soft skills are the hardest to master—for all of us.
Thanks – so what else should our readers know about your work and what you’re currently focused on?
First and foremost, I’ve always seen myself as a creative, a philosopher, and a teacher. This triad has always drawn me in—it just works.
It wasn’t until I landed a weekend corporate training gig through word of mouth that I realized how deeply I wanted to bring matters of the heart into the workplace. Leaders and employees alike are struggling, even hurting. Life isn’t supposed to be painful—we can do better. That seminar opened the door to more opportunities with leaders, and eventually, I was offered a role as an administrative director at a post-acute traumatic brain injury rehab facility. I got the job purely on my background in education and leadership. My director told me, The technical details can be learned—I need someone who can lead.
It was a 10x trial by fire—learning the ropes, building a team, and putting servant leadership into practice. Honestly, I wouldn’t even know how to grade myself. Some days, you ride high. A lot of days, you fall and take the lumps. But you keep on keeping on.
Life has a twisted sense of humor. It was as if the universe said, Oh, so you want to give lectures and write books on leadership? Great! Let me show you just how tough it really is at the top!
I came out of it with a lot more humility, which has made me a better coach for leaders. Vulnerability matters. You can’t truly connect with people unless they know you’re human—just as riddled with insecurities and imperfections as everyone else. There are no leadership gurus here—just people learning as they go.
We’d be interested to hear your thoughts on luck and what role, if any, you feel it’s played for you?
Hmm, interesting question. I’ve definitely experienced synchronistic moments along the way—the right people showing up, the right information coming through, the right course unfolding. I had a plan to get this message out, but life continued to surprise me with the details—the doors that opened in ways I never imagined.
Dr. King said, “Take the first step in faith. You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step.” Life is like this giant supercomputer. If you step out of your silo, seek meaningful connections, and focus on service, the right people show up to help you—and you help them in return. If that’s good luck, I’ll take it. Even if it sometimes shows up as bad luck, pushing me in a completely unexpected direction.
But ultimately, it’s about letting my message get inside me. You can’t reach an audience if they don’t see you trying to walk the walk. That’s what I love about teaching, too. Whatever you teach, you reinforce within yourself. And what’s more important to learn—especially in these bleak times—than inner peace, empathy, and service?
Luck be damned. Those gifts of the spirit are more precious than any happy chances.
Contact Info:
- Website: https://www.rjderossi.com
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rj_de_rossi/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100070677826914&ref=ig_profile_ac
- LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/r-j-de-rossi-715ba9279/?utm_source=share&utm_campaign=share_via&utm_content=profile&utm_medium=ios_app
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@r.j.derossi1909
Image Credits
Book Image by Ashley Galli, Portrait image by Brocoff Photography
