Check Out Ben Friend’s Story

Today we’d like to introduce you to Ben Friend.

Alright, so thank you so much for sharing your story and insight with our readers. To kick things off, can you tell us a bit about how you got started?
I was born in Hawaii on an island called Oahu, basically in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. I am one of six children, but I’m closest to my younger sister – so much so that we sometimes joke that we are twins because people often assume we are anyway. 

Growing up, I was a very creative and outgoing child who was lucky enough to have parents that completely supported my creative endeavors. They worked incredibly hard to provide for my siblings and me. I recall them (no exaggeration) going to the ends of the earth to ensure we were happy and well-rounded individuals. They were never perfect people, but they were absolutely perfect parents in the sense that they truly worked to understand my siblings and me as people so that they could help guide us as best they could to follow our dreams, use our skills and interests to build lives we are proud to live. My father passed away a few years ago, but the truth is, he lives on in my memories. His life lessons, advice, jokes, charisma – all of these things live on in my memories of him. Those memories guide my adult life despite him no longer being present. It kind of makes me realize how important my actions in life are – I aspire to be as amazing as my late father. 

I started taking ballet classes at the age of 6 at Ballet Hawaii after receiving a full merit scholarship. I only trained on full-merit scholarships in any creative field I studied because having such a large family was no easy feat, and our parents held incredibly high standards for each of us. I was professional at 15 years old and danced until i was 21. 

I learned the value of hard work and consistency at a young age, and that instilled a level of work ethic that has served me well as an adult, and for that, I am so grateful. I trained/danced with: Ballet Hawaii, Marin Dance Theater, 24-VII Dance Force Hawaii, Shooting Stars, Tau Dance Theater, The San Francisco Ballet/School, STEPS on Broadway, The School of American Ballet/NYC Ballet, Cincinnati Ballet, The Suzanne Farrell Ballet. 

After a brief career as a professional ballet dancer – due to an injury, I actually moved back home to Hawaii at 21 to recharge and strategize for my next steps in life. I can’t remember who said this, but there is a quote that goes something like, “A dancer dies two deaths, the day they stop dancing, and the day they die.” And I very much felt like a part of me died when I had to stop dancing full-time and had to get a job at Starbucks and then in retail. Dance had become my identity, my purpose, my calling, and my first love. So, to lose my life as a dancer due to no fault of my own was, in hindsight, quite devastating. But that heartbreak led me into day jobs that taught me new and valuable skills that have helped me with my creative work here in Los Angeles. Skills like time management, people management, multitasking, customer relations, sales, and operations – have all been instrumental in supporting my success with becoming a creative director. Real-life experience should never be looked down upon or disregarded as less than an education because I am living proof that you can succeed without a college degree. 

I do think being from such a beautiful, calm, and special place like Hawaii helped prepare me to mourn that part of my life in a more productive way. After my injury, I moved home for a short time and the time I spent there provided new opportunities to explore my other interests and creative talents without the pressure of a big city. 

To be honest, without the loss of my dance career, I wouldn’t be where I am today with my creative direction work, so I suppose you could say I am a believer in silver linings. 

Since moving to Los Angeles, I’ve worked managing luxury fitness and retail chains like TRBJ and Equinox/Shop – both of which led me into celebrity fashion styling, where I worked as a stylist on photoshoots and campaigns for celebrities like Mel B., Equinox (social media campaign 2015), Arsenic TV, OHRANGUTANG, Morten (Body Down Music Video) – just to name a few projects. I recently wrapped filming on the post-pandemic thriller “Yesteryear,” where I played an L.A. Casting Associate alongside my childhood friend and ballet classmate = Alma Award Winning Actress and Activist Q’orianka Kilcher (Reza Ghassemi and Jacob Stein. Serve as executive producers. Christopher pollock co-produces alongside co-executive producers Grant Roberts and Justin Rubin ). 

I currently work as Creative Director and Consultant in Fashion Design and Marketing with a focus on creating trendy accessories for some of the world’s largest upmarket brands like Equinox (I used to work for them, and now they are my client), Marc Jacobs, Wynn Las Vegas, The Four Seasons, Visions Studio, Soul Cycle, Kitson – just to name a few. I love what I do now because I am able to apply all my skills, talents, and interests into my daily work. I was able to mutate the tragedy of losing my dance identity into a more fulfilling life, creating things that make people feel happy. 

Alright, so let’s dig a little deeper into the story – has it been an easy path overall, and if not, what were the challenges you’ve had to overcome?
You know, as much as I’d like to sit here and say that everything I dreamed of happened exactly according to plan, I can’t deceive you or anyone else out there reading this who may also have a dream and a plan to get there. I have experienced things many people would only watch on a television show. 

I’ve hit plenty of bumps along the way, but having 1, 2, or 3 backup plans is necessary in order to bounce back from failures, missteps, or any unforeseen events that are inevitable as you make your way along the path of life. I wasn’t prepared for what happened on my path, and while I am grateful that I lived a very protected childhood all the way in Hawaii, I wish I was less naive about some things before I moved to big cities for school. 

It’s personally very important for me to mention that I am a survivor of abuse. I used to be ashamed of that because I felt that by admitting I was abused as an adult, it somehow made me weak. But I find that often, the most sensitive artists are some of the strongest human beings. The problem is cruel, hurt, or just plain bad people take advantage of kind, sensitive people and often underestimate them. Which, in my case, was definitely true. It wasn’t until one of my abusers past away in a car accident that I was able to sleep without worrying about them entering my home to harm me. I think being able to move on from that trauma has only made me stronger and more determined to continue to reach and expand my life goals. It’s important for me to point out that some of the milestone accomplishments I’ve achieved in life were when I was secretly being abused and hid it from everyone in my life (until I couldn’t any longer). 

My main message to anyone out there who feels like they are less-than or struggling to accomplish something – never stop working hard and never give up. Because if I can get through what I went through, you can too. I believe in you, but you have to believe in yourself in order to move forward and make your life what you want it to be. 

Alright, so let’s switch gears a bit and talk business. What should we know about your work?
I currently design upmarket private label accessories and apparel for brands such as Equinox, Marc Jacobs, Wynn Las Vegas, The Four Seasons, and Kitson in Beverly Hills. I conceptualize, sketch, mockup/CAD, and edit all parts of the design journey myself, which allows me to better communicate creative ideas to clients who aren’t necessarily inclined in the same areas. 

Often, brands will hire outside resources/consultants for creative direction on pieces to be sold under their own brand names. This can be a cost-effective way for brands that are looking to test new categories to implement them without all the in-house work that goes into producing new items. For example, if a brand’s focus is a service like dentistry or hospitality, hiring a creative team that can come in and help extend the brand’s messaging through fashion accessories like hats or socks becomes a necessary growth initiative. 

What sets me apart from other creatives is my vast knowledge of the private label fashion landscape, paired with my creative technical skills that help me sell projects/concepts and get the job done without a large team under me. I am proficient in many tools, such as Adobe Suite, E-commerce platforms, and Social Media Platforms etc. I went viral at 15 for a song I wrote and posted on MySpace, which earned me the title of Hawaii’s #1 electro artist before I was 18. So, when it comes to what will work with a creative avenue, I am confident, well-versed, and accomplished enough to provide valuable insight and perspective. 

We’d love to hear about any fond memories you have from when you were growing up.
Running around barefoot all day at the beach, then right before sunset, getting shaved ice at Matsumoto’s in Haleiwa on the North Shore of Hawaii and eating it, then having a slight chill on the drive home after. Something about that is so comforting, and anytime I go home, I visit Matsumoto’s shaved ice to get my fix. 

Pricing:

• I offer free 30-minute consultations
• 250K/YR

Contact Info:

• Website: onlybenfriend.com
• Instagram: @FAKEBESTFRIEND
• Facebook: facebook.com/thefakebestfriend
• Twitter: twitter.com/fakebestfriend
• Youtube: youtube.com/fakebestfriend

Image Credits
Ben Friend