Today we’d like to introduce you to Jenni-Leigh Williams.
Hi Jenni-Leigh, we’re thrilled to have a chance to learn your story today. So, before we get into specifics, maybe you can briefly walk us through how you got to where you are today?
Photography has always been a passion of mine, actually art in general. I love the way you can literally see the world through another’s eyes in art; the way it triggers emotions. I feel like for too long society has conditioned us that being emotional or empathetic is a sign of weakness when in reality it’s what connects us all as humans. We’ve been way too out of touch with our own emotions that, of course, the world lacks empathy because we’ve been desensitized. Art brings us back to our authentic selves, seeing the world as we did when we were kids before society conditioned us to see things through their eyes instead of our own. Any form of art is such a unique way for someone to express themselves & I find incredibly rare beauty in that. Being an artist is a rebellious thing–it’s knowing the rules, standards & expectations but having the courage not to fall in line because it doesn’t align with who you are or what your values are.
It wasn’t until I became a mom that I realized how much generational trauma & cycles affects us all. Like most parents, I was triggered being a first-time mom. I was never aware of how much healing my inner child so desperately needed. It was a turning point for me in my journey. It broke me because I quickly realized how I was contributing to the unhealthy generational cycles by passing them onto my daughter & I didn’t want that. So I chose to do the inner work necessary to instead start healing cycles in my lineage because I didn’t want that to become her responsibility.
As a first-generation Filipina, being a creative or advocating for yourself isn’t supported or encouraged. It’s shamed as being disloyal, selfish, disrespectful & ungrateful. I’ve always felt like an outsider & I never understood why until I started my healing journey a few years ago. Healers aren’t like anyone else because we challenge the norms. We don’t see things how we’re taught to, we see things as they are. I used to wonder how come people fight so hard to defend something or someone who’s clearly in the wrong. But I realized it’s because wrong has been so normalized for too long & people will fight to defend that because it’s what we’ve been conditioned to do. Especially for those who have not yet started healing, they’ll see things through the lens of their trauma, past pain & wounded inner child because it’s triggering so naturally you switch to defensive mode if you’re not yet aware of those triggers.
Art is our way of taking our power back & sharing our vision with the world of living in our authenticity rather than our conditions & generational cycles. Those don’t define who we are. We get to choose. And when we choose to take our power back by first healing ourselves, we give others permission to find solitude knowing they can choose to do the same for themselves. It’s not about changing the world around us, it’s about creating change within us because we can only control ourselves. And for too long, we’ve been conditioned to believe that it’s about controlling everything & everyone around us. When we surrender the need to control, we allow room for growth; for change. And I understand that scares people because change requires going into unknown territory–outside of your comfort zone. But that’s also where everything you’ve ever dreamed of is waiting for you.
Last year my therapist helped me realize the reason I’ve been in my own way is because I was such a perfectionist people-pleaser that I felt like I needed to prove myself in order to be worthy & enough. I have lived my life trying so hard to live up to others’ unrealistic standards & expectations of me that doing so has actually been blocking my blessings. So I tried doing things without ANY expectation for me to succeed & instead simply doing them for the joy it brings me, for wanting to learn something new. And I really surprised myself because when I relinquished the need to control the outcomes, I allowed myself space to grow & in making this a habit I started to change. I felt like myself again as I did when I was a kid. It taught me that we can actually learn more from kids than us teaching them. Kids don’t play & explore with any intention to become successful or to please others. Over time they’re conditioned this way, but they do things simply because it brings them joy because they’re curious & want to learn, & because they want to push themselves outside their comfort zone to see what they’re truly capable of. And we all stopped doing that little by little as we got older because of family, religious, cultural & societal standards & expectations. But if we get back to how we were as kids, we start to live in our authenticity again.
I finally decided to pursue my passion for photography with the intention to learn as much as I possibly can for the next 6 months which then became a year & I surprised myself with how much I pushed outside of my comfort zone seeing what I’m really capable of. I continue to keep this commitment to myself because I finally have gotten to a place in my life where I’ve never felt more myself & I’m finally living for myself, no one else. I can’t encourage my daughter to pursue her dreams, advocate for herself, or prioritize herself if I don’t first do so for myself. After all, they learn from us showing them rather than telling them.
I’ve found solitude, connection & power in sharing my vulnerabilities. And I hope that in continuing to do so, it does the same for someone else–knowing they’re not alone, becoming aware of their triggers & trauma, letting them know that if I can have the courage to heal so can they & encouraging them that they are worthy enough to pursue their passions. When we focus on changing our inner world, our outer world will follow. For too long, I thought it was the other way around.
Would you say it’s been a smooth road, and if not what are some of the biggest challenges you’ve faced along the way?
It’s been anything but smooth. My faith has definitely been tested more times than I can count but once I learned to let go & let God & just trust the process it’s crazy how things have been aligning! I always knew photography was in God’s plan for me but for too long I allowed outside influences to discourage me from pursuing it. Thankfully though, my mom & my husband have always been my support system & encouraged me to pursue my passions rather than doing something that supposedly provides financial stability according to society’s standards. They didn’t want me to end up doing something that’s unfulfilling & would make me unhappy for the rest of my life. I get my creative gifts from my mom, & my husband is also the same way–we’re very multi-passionate & multi-talented. When we get a creative idea, we run with it & are always finding different ways of doing things. But even though it’s a blessing, it was also another struggle I experienced.
Because I’m multi-passionate & multi-talented, it was hard for me to choose just one thing & stick to it. I don’t like being boxed into one label, I love having creative freedom. I don’t like labels of any kind really because of how society tends to use labels to define people & when you do that, you hinder people’s growth. People then believe they aren’t capable of being anything outside of who/what they’re defined as, which isn’t true of course. Through both my healing & motherhood journeys, I’ve learned that people’s opinions are actually just projections of their own insecurities, doubts & fears. One quote I saw really resonated, it said, “Your reaction to me is a reflection of you. My reaction to you is an awareness of me.” Once I understood this, I stopped internalizing everything & taking everything personal. Everything & everyone that used to affect me just didn’t anymore & I can’t even begin to tell you how freeing that feeling was. I think that was my biggest struggle was the mental & emotional block. Thankfully through therapy, I was able to not only work through that but also past that & once I did, that’s when everything started to align. My husband was also a huge factor in my growth journey because he’s shown me how you can blossom into your most unapologetic, authentic self when you’re loved unconditionally & are shown grace through ALL the ups & downs in your journey. Having that in your support system is so important. He’s kept me grounded & has created a safe space that allowed me to grow into the person I am today & I can’t even begin to say how grateful I am for that.
As you know, we’re big fans of you and your work. For our readers who might not be as familiar what can you tell them about what you do?
I am a lifestyle, portrait, fashion & editorial photographer based in San Jose & work in the surrounding Bay Area. I’m a first-generation Filipina, a mom, as well as a multi-passionate creative. I strive to capture authenticity, empower strength in vulnerabilities, celebrate your highs just as much as your lows & help creatively tell your story visually & artistically.
You would probably think what I’m most proud of are tangible life accomplishments but actually what I’m most proud of is the inner work I’ve done that people haven’t seen & it’s starting to show & align now in my outer world. I’m so excited for all the amazing opportunities that have been coming my way! I certainly have surprised myself with what I’m actually capable of in the short period of time I’ve been doing this. As I continue my photography journey, I’m looking forward to seeing how much more I can do & how much more I can surprise myself. I know now that I’m in alignment with who I am, the blessings God has in store for me will be more than anything I could ever imagine so I’m excited to see where I’ll be at 5 years from now, 10 years from now, & so on.
I’m also really proud of putting myself out there! If my younger self were to see me now, she wouldn’t believe how much I’ve been pushing outside of my comfort zone! I’ve really been taking the time to invest in myself & take advantage of every opportunity possible to learn from amazing photographers & creatives. There never really is a “right” time & you’ll never feel fully “ready,” you just have to decide & know that you are worthy enough & no matter how uncomfortable you may feel, know you belong in the room. Take up space! Be vocal! Be you! And be proud of that!
What sets me apart is I would say my mindset & my vision–the way I think & the way I see things. I always tend to have an unpopular opinion but it wasn’t until recently that I’ve started vocalizing that because I was a people-pleaser & would just go along with everyone else to avoid any kind of confrontation or disagreement. It’s crazy how much I’ve changed just within the last few years & even just within the past year. People who think they know me would need to get reacquainted because that version of me they used to know is gone. I’ve never felt more authentically me than I do now & as long as I’m doing the work God set out for me to do, I know I’m on the right path. Doing the work to break cycles, redefine norms & setting new standards is the hardest work anyone could ever do, but I do it so that my daughter doesn’t feel the same pressures to be molded into someone she’s not just to be deemed worthy for society’s benefit.
Do you have any memories from childhood that you can share with us?
Oh my gosh, there are too many! I think overall, my favorites surround quality time. Whether it was traveling far or to new places or exploring new places here around the Bay Area or even doing the simplest things to spend quality time with my parents & family were what I loved most. My parents divorced when I was really young so I grew up living with my mom here in the Bay Area while my dad traveled a lot for work. I got to travel quite a bit with my dad & we both shared the passion for photography as well. That’s when I started noticing how much I loved photography because the way you see the world through your lens is so different from how someone else sees it. And there’s no wrong way, it’s just different views of beauty. I traveled quite a bit with my mom too but I remember no matter how busy our schedules got, she always made sure to make time spending quality efforts more so than quantity. She would find creative ways of doing so like sometimes we would pack a picnic & go to the park, pack food & go to San Francisco or Santa Cruz or check out local events around the Bay Area. There’s always something going on every season so she always found something for us to do together & I cherish those memories. It’s also what my husband & I try to do in our family because we want our daughter to have those childhood memories too of experiences rather than material things.
Contact Info:
- Instagram: @212_photography
- Linkedin: www.linkedin.com/in/jenni-leigh-williams-464499243
- Other: https://gallery.pixieset.com/collection/
