Today we’d like to introduce you to Victoria Nelson.
Victoria, please share your story with us. How did you get to where you are today?
My oldest daughter, Moriah, was born with a rare, medically-complex syndrome called CHARGE. We lived the first two years of her life in hospitals and a sub-acute facility until we were able to finally bring Moriah home, with a tracheostomy, ventilator, oxygen, feeding pump, and a team of home nurses.
We didn’t mind though because we were so stoked to have our daughter home, and we were determined to help her live as normal of a life as possible. We went on to have other children, who became some of Moriah’s best friends. Moriah attended school, loved music, played with classmates, went to therapies, and was living a full life until an infection took over her body, and she passed away close to 7 years of age.
From the moment she was born, Moriah taught me about love. She taught me not only how to love her, but to love others. My husband, Justin, and I couldn’t help but look beyond ourselves into the world she brought us. Whether it was the friend in the bedside next to her, her Nurse, her Doctor, her Therapist she showed us how to see beyond the surface. Moriah taught us that there was so much more beyond words, beyond looks, beyond what is ‘normal, beyond what is expected, beyond what is in our control. She showed us how to love well and how to love deeply to look into someone’s eyes, and see that they are beautiful, and see their value.
While we saw so much goodness that came from people during our time with Moriah, we saw that there was still so much room to grow as a society in the way we see and value people with special needs. I saw that not everyone saw Moriah for who she was, nor valued her the way she should have been. Because she didn’t speak, she was often ignored or written off. Because she looked different, I was asked,What’s wrong with her?? (in front of her, might I add). Or I was even asked why I didn’t abort her as if her life was totally disposable.
And many times during Moriah’s life, I would take her out, and people would just stare at her, not knowing what to do or say. So when the staring was really awkward, to break the tension I’d tell Moriah to start waving, and say ‘Hi.’ This would usually allow for people to start engaging and actually see Moriah instead of all the medical equipment.
Then, after she passed away, ‘Hiya Moriah’ came to mind. My hope is that through this book, everyone will learn to say ‘hiya’ when meeting someone like Moriah. I believe knowledge and empathy are powerful tools to have, and can break down the social barriers that exist when making friends who are different than us allowing us to respect each other and see one another for who we really are and not for what we look like.
“Hiya Moriah” has was released in March 2019, and I’ve been blown away by the response of people around the world. I’ve had many people tell me that their children are feeling represented, and can identify with Moriah as a friend because she shares in their challenges. I’ve also had comments that children have learned to reach out and make new friends like Moriah. My hope is that this book continues to create awareness about differences, and teach empathy and inclusion through a simple ‘hiya!’
We’re always bombarded by how great it is to pursue your passion, etc? but we’ve spoken with enough people to know that it’s not always easy. Overall, would you say things have been easy for you?
Nope. Getting my first children’s book published did not come easy! I spent a whole year working with another illustrator on ‘Hiya Moriah’ and lost a publishing deal because of a difference in expectations between me and the illustrator as we never created a contract before starting our work together ?? (my biggest piece of advice that I now give to others)! I was utterly heartbroken to have wasted a whole year, delaying ‘Hiya Moriah’ getting out into the world in addition to a relationship lost with someone. I’m not the fighting type and have never had an unresolved argument in my adult life! This disagreement was so emotionally draining and I didn’t want my book, so pure and good tainted with something so upsetting! I apologized to the illustrator for my impatience and frustration, offered my forgiveness and grace, and we parted ways.
And, I started from scratch I did it once, I could do it again! But, I’d be lying if I didn’t admit I wanted to just quit. I wanted nothing more than to GIVE UP after losing it all. But, I knew Moriah’s story needed to get out and good things are worth fighting for. So, I took my vision and sketches and found another illustrator, Boddz. We created a contract, worked HARD and finished it in 4 months. I re-submitted the book to the publisher and received another deal this time, all parties signed off on what was needed with no problems! It wasn’t the way I expected my first children’s book to go. A story in honor of my daughter who passed away -something that was SO precious and close to my heart, and to have it fall to pieces the way it did. However, nothing really goes as we plan or expect, does it? All I know now is that the perseverance and hard work has paid off. To see so many impacted by Moriah’s story, and how it’s creating an awareness of differences and disabilities and spreading a message of inclusion, it makes the fight so worth it!!
So, as you know, we’re impressed with ‘Hiya Moriah’ tell our readers more, for example what you’re most proud of and what sets you apart from others.
Well, this is a book that families can enjoy together with a timeless message about love and acceptance, and just saying ‘hiya’ when making a new friend with different abilities. The bonus picture glossary and What’s This What’s That?? page in ‘Hiya Moriah’creates a space for children to celebrate how special and unique each of them were made to be.
I think that this book will allow children to enter a world that is different than their own, and to learn how to empathize. I provide a lot of education around the medical equipment and have the illustrations detailed and life-like so that children can see it, learn it, and recognize it in the world around them. I really believe knowledge is power, and it can help break down any social barriers that exist when making friends who are different than us. And reading the book at home provides a safe space to ask all the questions and talk about our differences.
I’m most proud of the legacy that Moriah is leaving, and the impact that the book is having not just on others, but also on my family, my children are invested in doing book readings and events, and sharing about their sister. It’s been really beautiful to watch them own their own stories with Moriah and to notice others around them who they now say ‘hi’ to because of their sister.
So, what’s next? Any big plans?
I’m finishing up my next second inclusive children’s book, and I can’t wait to get it out there!
Pricing:
- Softcover $14.95 plus tax
- Hardcover $22.95 plus tax
Contact Info:
- Website: www.victorianelsonbooks.com
- Email: [email protected]
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/victorianelson/
- Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Moments-with-Moriah-1523838487857924/
Image Credit:
Sachiko Studio
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