We recently had the chance to connect with Alyssa Mei Liu and have shared our conversation below.
Good morning Alyssa Mei, it’s such a great way to kick off the day – I think our readers will love hearing your stories, experiences and about how you think about life and work. Let’s jump right in? What are you chasing, and what would happen if you stopped?
I’m a big believer in predestination. While I think we have free will to make our own choices, I do believe that before we came to this earth, we had a choice of what life we wanted to live and what path we wanted to take. I know I chose a hard path. I heavily believe that my mission in life is to help women find their voice and stand up for themselves. If I stopped, the world would continue on, but as long as I continue, I believe I can help change if not save some lives.
Can you briefly introduce yourself and share what makes you or your brand unique?
I’m a traveling burlesque circus performer. I do aerial silks, lyra hoop, pole, fire eating & fleshing and acrobatic burlesque. I’ve performed around the world and have had residencies in Hollywood, Miami and Vegas. I also toured along Australia and performed in Barcelona and New York. I’ve also used my acrobatics in my modeling career and have been fortunate enough to be a Playboy and Maxim model. I recently acted in a couple of horror movies that are coming out next year and have started my own podcast. Both these things are heavily significant to me right now. Having had such a sensual career, I’ve seen and experienced a lot of challenges that come with being a sexual icon. It’s difficult. My role in my movies as well as my podcast seek to bring light to the challenges women face in claiming their own bodies, finding their role in relationships and being a feminist while still being a woman. I think these are really important things our society is trying to figure out right now.
Okay, so here’s a deep one: Who were you before the world told you who you had to be?
I was definitely a very good girl in my early life. I was a strict rule follower but I always kind of beat to my own drum. The first twenty years of my life I was heavily religious and academic. I went on mission trips to Kazakstan, Philippines, Rwanda, Uganda and China. I also published two books and spoke in churches around the world inspiring people to stand up and make a change for those less fortunate. And I graduated university by the time I was twenty. I was always who I wanted to be, but I had a part of myself that was heavily constrained. Once I broke out of that, I had an intense personality change and became the burlesque dancer and model that I am. I would say that that world nearly ate me alive and probably made me more sexual than I had intended on being. It wasn’t until I hit 29 that I felt I really found my identity as a woman who claims her power in her sexuality especially in her artistic work but also strives to help people and make a difference.
What have been the defining wounds of your life—and how have you healed them?
I think there have been a number of times when the most important man in my life scared me into thinking I was going to die. There were three different times with three different men. One was my dad, one was my ex-husband and one was a guy I was dating. Only one of them made me think he was going to kill me, the other two weren’t fully aware of how detrimental their actions were on me. I think these three men changed me as a person and made me believe I wasn’t worth love. I’d say my art/career, therapy and finding true love in my friendships, relationships and family were the main things that healed and continue to heal me. But I also think that in focusing on loving myself, primarily by learning to set boundaries, say no, and stand up for myself were the big things that not only brought about change, but brought about reconciliation with two out of the three. Having both those men return into my life asking for forgiveness and showing change through their actions not because I chased them but because I took a solid stand, said no more and walked away showed me that standing up for yourself is the most important thing you can do to be a healthy person and to push THEM to be a healthy person too.
I think our readers would appreciate hearing more about your values and what you think matters in life and career, etc. So our next question is along those lines. Is the public version of you the real you?
Absolutely not. When people close to me see me at work or online they’re always shocked by the character that comes out. While I strive to be fairly authentic on stage, at events or online, I hold my truths, my loves, and my relationships close to my heart where no one else except my inner circle can see it. I’ve heavily detached from my work persona and can actually feel when I go into a different part of my brain to access the character I need for my work. But in reality, there’s only a handful of people that get to see the real me and I like it that way. Energy is everything and it’s important to protect your own.
Before we go, we’d love to hear your thoughts on some longer-run, legacy type questions. Have you ever gotten what you wanted, and found it did not satisfy you?
I’ve always been a hard worker and generally get what I want because I’m not scared to put in the work to get there. I think the most shocking thing was when I finally had shows all over the country, a beautiful penthouse apartment and a solid name as a Playboy model and I felt empty. I didn’t realize it but it was actually the chase that really kept me alive more than the actual thing. The following year, I decided to slow down, travel less, and put myself out there less because I realized what I wanted had changed. I had already gotten what I was running after so I realized it was ok to want new things. It was also ok to not know what I wanted and to just try new things. I toured on a ship in Australia, got my EMT certificate and even started training jujitsu. I went to events less and found less appeal getting attention or being on the red carpet, but I came to find that that was ok. Just because you got what you always wanted doesn’t mean you have to stick with it for the rest of your life. In fact, it’s better to keep going and find new things that bring you joy.
Contact Info:
- Instagram: alyssameiliu
- Facebook: Alyssa Mei Liu
- Youtube: Alyssa Mei Liu
- Other: Tiktok: Main Account is currently deleted – @alyssa.mei.liu.2 & @alyssameiliu2
