Bita Aghaee shared their story and experiences with us recently and you can find our conversation below.
Bita, a huge thanks to you for investing the time to share your wisdom with those who are seeking it. We think it’s so important for us to share stories with our neighbors, friends and community because knowledge multiples when we share with each other. Let’s jump in: What are you being called to do now, that you may have been afraid of before?
As a chronic people pleaser, I’m no stranger to putting others needs above my own. That’s just how I was raised. It was important to be selfless and it was terrible to be selfish.
Communicating and standing by my wants, needs, and boundaries has always been difficult. I find that now, in all my relationships and even in my job, I’m being called to do exactly that.
It’s difficult to step outside of your comfort zone and stand your ground. Say, “this is what I need and if you can’t give it to me, then I’m gone.”
It’s scary to put yourself out there. To express what you need and stand your ground. It’s incredibly scary.
But I’m learning little by little how I deserve to put myself first. I deserve to communicate and be firm in my boundaries.
It might get easier as time goes on, it still feels difficult now, but all you can do is try.
All you can do is take one step at a time, no matter how tiny they are.
Can you briefly introduce yourself and share what makes you or your brand unique?
I wish it was easier for me to narrow this down!
I’m an aspiring performer trying to navigate my dreams in the best way I know how.
I’ve always been called to music and theatre and that’s where my heart belongs. My culture doesn’t support careers in the arts and it’s hardly recognized – I’d consider myself the odd one out in my community.
I’m a firm believer that you should always chase what gives you joy and what you feel your purpose is. Embrace yourself and your talents.
I’ve always fought to bring that message to other young girls who may feel outcasted because of who they are.
Great, so let’s dive into your journey a bit more. What was your earliest memory of feeling powerful?
In my childhood I didn’t often feel powerful. I actually didn’t feel powerful at all. I tried to shrink into myself as much as possible because I was afraid to take up space. Feeling like I was a waste of space and a burden to all those around me was a very common feeling.
The first time I ever felt powerful actually was when I was about 9 years old. I had just seen Tessanne Chin perform ‘I Have Nothing’ on The Voice and I witnessed both of parents in awe. My father had said she had an incredible voice and my mother praised her for nailing such a difficult ballad.
I took it upon myself to download the song onto my ipod and listen to it 24/7 until I knew all the words.
One day I was taking a shower and decided I should give it a try. I belted out the song the best I could and heard a small knock on the door.
My mom peaked her head in and said “was that you singing?” and I nodded.
When I came out of the shower, she told me she thought I sounded wonderful and that she wanted to put my in voice lessons.
I felt for the first time like I was good at something. Something beautiful, something difficult.
From that point on I took vocal lessons once and week and grew into the insufferable theatre kid I am today.
What did suffering teach you that success never could?
That no one is coming.
“No one is coming.”
Suffering is a part of life. There are people that can assist you in getting through it, but when it happens, no one is there.
No one is coming to save you.
You want to be saved? You save yourself.
Everything that helps push you through it is just an accessory, you have to do all the work to get yourself out of whatever hole you’re in.
I think our readers would appreciate hearing more about your values and what you think matters in life and career, etc. So our next question is along those lines. What important truth do very few people agree with you on?
You should live your life for you.
Your life is your own.
If what you want to do makes you happy, you should do it.
Sure, money makes the world go round but it’s insane to live your life for money.
There’s more to life than that.
don’t you want to be happy?
Do what makes you happy. If that’s driving a school bus, or being a CEO, or being a musician, DO IT.
Live your life the way YOU want. and if you don’t know what you want, figure it out.
It’s never too late to change your mind. to go in a different direction.
just stay true to you and what you deserve.
Okay, so let’s keep going with one more question that means a lot to us: Could you give everything your best, even if no one ever praised you for it?
Praise is not something I receive well.
it never came often as a child.
It’s nice to receive, but it’s not something I’ve come to expect.
It’s a double edged sword.
Everything was an obligation, not an accomplishment.
For me, giving everything your all is an obligation. You can celebrate it as an accomplishment, but unfortunately due to the core beliefs I had no choice to have instilled in me, it’s hard for me to take anything as an accomplishment.
Contact Info:
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bitaaghaee/?hl=en
- Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/bita-aghaee-0777451b8
- Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@bitaaghaee1882
- Soundcloud: https://soundcloud.com/bita-aghaee
