Thanks for sharing your story with us Barbara. So, let’s start at the beginning and we can move on from there.
I’m a speaker, author, and one of Bob Proctor’s top certified consultants for a program that I facilitate called, “Thinking into Results.” Some of you may know of Bob Proctor from the movie, “The Secret.” Because of some missing information in the movie, Bob Proctor and Sandy Gallagher, who was a highly successful bank acquisition lawyer, decided to create an outstanding program to show people how to transform their lives through action in order to achieve outstanding results. When I took the program for myself, I doubled my practice and tripled my income in one year.
Prior to becoming a speaker, coach, and leader, I spent 25 years in the entertainment industry. I have a Masters in directing from UCLA and I worked with the Olsen twins, Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen, for ten years as their personal acting coach. I ran a very successful Acting Academy for young performers and many of my students are successful industry professionals today. I was helping a lot of other people achieve great financial success but I wasn’t doing it for myself. I was a perfectionist who told people how to do things but I didn’t apply the information to my own life.
It wasn’t until I suddenly lost my husband to lung cancer two months before our 25th wedding anniversary that I started to understand that I didn’t know how to love myself. I didn’t know how to create my life from the inside out. I had spent my life living from the outside in trying to seek approval from everyone outside of me.
My husband was diagnosed with fourth stage lung cancer on May 5, 2003, and gone three weeks later on the 31st. Following his death, I found my mother-in-law dead in her apartment, a best friend of 25 years died, then my father also died of lung cancer two months after his diagnosis, and lastly, my forty-year-old brother-in-law died when he jumped out of a plane and his parachute didn’t open. He was the instructor and the young man who was tandem diving with him also died.
To say the least, my life spiraled out of control. I shut down my school. I shut down my private acting coaching practice. And for three years, I looked for ways to join my loved ones on the other side. I didn’t realize how codependent I was. I no longer had my loved one to tell me how valuable I was. I used my perfectionism to attack, berate and loathe myself. It was a Dark Night of the Soul. I discovered that losing the love of my life, I didn’t know how to love myself. My book,” True love, True Self: a journey to self-love”, describes how I learned to love myself, value myself, and let go of my crippling perfectionism.
The turning point for me was when I made a decision not to be miserable anymore. I decided that there was more for me to do but I didn’t know what. I had no idea what was next in my life. I felt lost and unsure of how I was going to survive. I decided to study Spiritual Psychology in a Masters program at the University of Santa Monica and my life started to change. Then, I certified as a Quantum Success coach with the Quantum Success Coaching Academy, primarily to continue my own healing. I didn’t expect that I would be coaching other people but when I started working with clients and saw their results, it was a path I continued to explore. I kept waking up to a nudging feeling that I had greatness inside. I didn’t know how to tap it. I didn’t even know what it was, I just knew that there was more for me. After certifying with Bob Proctor, I never expected that my hidden talents would create more money, more clients, and more freedom in my life.
It has become my passion and my mission to help others live into the fullest expression of who they can be: to step into a bigger version of themselves that is calling for more and to step out and be visible as the star player in their own lives. It’s time to stop the lies and acknowledge the truth. The lies that I kept telling myself almost killed me. I wasn’t perfect enough, I wasn’t smart enough, I wasn’t confident enough… I am happy to say that I am now serving a much bigger version of myself. You will never outperform your self-image. You will never outperform what you already know. It takes willingness, commitment, and deliberate conscious effort to create the changes that you want to see in your life. “Are you willing to change or are you just interested”, is a daily question that I ask myself. If you’re just interested, you’ll do whatever is convenient for you. If you’re committed, you’ll do whatever it takes to get results.
We’re always bombarded by how great it is to pursue your passion, etc. – but we’ve spoken with enough people to know that it’s not always easy. Overall, would you say things have been easy for you?
As I shared, it hasn’t been a smooth road. The advice that I would give young women is to listen to what brings them joy and to develop their self-image. As I mentioned, you’ll never outperform your self-image. I would advise them to create stretch goals and go after a desire that excites them and scares them at the same time so that they can discover parts of themselves that they never knew existed. If you know how to reach your goal, you’re going in the wrong direction. It’s about the journey, the process of self-discovery and who you become along the way.
I would tell them to go big, be bold, and persist in their dreams. Get help, mentorship, accountability partners, and mastermind with like-minded people. Don’t think that you can do it alone. There are people who want to help others succeed.
I would advise them to receive criticism as feedback and to focus on what is working in their lives rather than focus on what isn’t working. Positive thinking isn’t about having a Pollyanna viewpoint; it’s about being solution-focused and creative. It’s about choosing to respond rather than react.
I would also encourage them to invest in themselves. Invest in personal development and grow an awareness about mindset and how the mind works. It all starts with a mindset. It takes awareness to become abundant, successful, and happy. The consciousness of someone earning $50,000 a year is not the same consciousness as someone who earns $150,000 a year.
Please tell us more about your work, what you are currently focused on and most proud of.
I am a Success Coach, author of “True Love, True Self: a Journey to Self-love” and an inspirational speaker. I work with entrepreneurs, business owners, and individuals showing them how to break through their fears, limitations, and negative mindsets in order to accomplish big dreams.
I help people learn how to re-wire their brains and re-program their minds so that they can say goodbye to procrastination, perfectionism, and low self-esteem. I’ve created a couple of programs, “Act Your Way to Success” and “Your Genius Code Unlocked.” I’m also a certified “Thinking into Results” consultant with the Proctor/Gallagher Institute.
I spent most of my career in Theatre Arts, Film and Television as a director, acting coach, writer, and producer. Inow blend 25 years of acting, directing and writing experience inspiring people to connect with their higher selves so that they can lead happy, productive, and fulfilled lives. I have an MFA in theater directing from UCLA andI’ve coached top players in the entertainment industry for more than twenty-five years. I’m known for pulling the best performance out of my clients.
What do you feel are the biggest barriers today to female leadership, in your industry or generally?
The biggest barriers in female leadership that I see today is a result of low self-esteem, low self-confidence, and low self-worth. The irony is that most people aren’t aware of their own thoughts that are debilitating and non-serving.
If someone had told me that I didn’t know how to love myself, I would’ve thought they were wrong. But now, I see how seeking outside approval kept me from playing a bigger game. I didn’t value my talents, my gifts, and my life experience. I was dependent on what others thought and I tried to continually prove my worth to them without getting the results that I wanted. I showed others how to succeed and didn’t apply my own knowledge to create bigger results for myself.
It’s important for female leaders to get support and mentorship. One of the biggest barriers is trying to imitate others rather than building a personal vision for oneself.
- I facilitate “Thinking into Results” groups online, in-person, as well as on a private basis. The price varies.
- I also coach private clients and offer 3 month, 6 month, and 12 month packages. The price varies.
- “Your Genius Code Unlocked”, is a brainwave entrainment program to help re-wire your brain and re-program your mind is currently $247.00. The website is www.vibrantresults.com
- I run “You Were Born Rich” Mastermind groups in-person. The cost is $500 for 11 eleven weeks.
- Website: www.barbaradaoust.com
- Phone: 818-378-5717
- Email: barbara@barbaradaoust.
- Facebook: https://www.
- Other: www.vibrantresults.com
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